Dear Tokyo Times
Like Rod who wrote in recently, I’ve also been offered a job in Japan, but personally I’m much more interested in the females than the food. So without wanting to sound too desperate, do you have any advice about getting myself a Japanese girlfriend?
JJ, Boston
Hardly being a legendary Lothario myself JJ, I’m not perhaps the best person to give advice on such matters, but for starters, at least a basic knowledge of brands would undoubtedly serve you well. Big name bags along the lines of Louis Vuitton are incredibly popular with the ladies, so being able to pick out a Prada from a Puma would certainly be helpful. And with this in mind, the purchase of such products as presents is guaranteed to make you very popular indeed.
Immersing yourself in the complexities of ‘cuteness’ is arguably also a must, with the ability to coo uncontrollably over Chihuahuas or cry out ‘kawaii’ at a new haircut producing plenty of opportunities.
And it goes without saying that feigning interest in famous felines will be a big aid in your action-related ambitions.
Perhaps most of all though, just being yourself and ignoring such stereotypical claptrap is best.
Mostly.
Daniel says
Many Japanese women are quite interested in western men. Most seem to prefer a one-off exciting night with an exotic gaijin man, some are actually interested in a relationship. (There’s still some sort of stigma about dating gaijin.)
You will definatly do better than “back home”. You’ll find yourself getting a lot more attention from the ladies than ever before. Being a Buddhist country, casual sex isn’t a taboo in Japan. You may be misled to think that Japanese women are “easy”, this is incorrect. It’s just a different culture that takes sex a lot easier. This is good ofc!
The same general rules still apply though. Good looks and sharp attire will always get the most attention, and confidence goes a long way too. It also doesn’t hurt if your Nihongo is up to scratch. 😉 Gaijin men can often be intimidating and Japanese women seem to prefer fun over macho, so smile a lot and be super fun and friendly, should work!
Have fun JJ
disgusted says
Wow…you’re a pro at Japanese women aren’t you.
You know the culture enough to say that they “take sex” a lot easier???
Is this a game??
Paul says
What does being a Buddhist country have to do with it? I lived in East Asia for six years and I found practising Buddhists to be very moral people who certainly would not engage in casual sex. On the other hand, my country, Australia, which is nominally a Christian country, casual sex is certainly not taboo, either, and often engaged in by a certain proportion of the population. I find your implied slur on Buddhism offensive.
Mark says
Buddhism and sex go hand in hand. At any rate it is not taboo and very accepted as well as drinking and gambling especially in the Japanese variety of Buddhism where the rules have been changed. Buddhism is actually anti Japanese in that lord Buddha left his family which is a taboo in Japan but they have overlooked it. There are many fertility sexual festivals in Japan but I believe that more comes from Shinto.
Sex is treated more casually that say the USA where most people say Americans are uptight about it. Sexual references are everywhere in Japan even in Manga and children’s cartoons or anime. Extra marital sex is also very common and there is little shame in partaking as long as you don’t flaunt it.
If you don’t like these facts about Japan change the culture instead of blaming the messengers.
cmndx says
Paul, you’re an idiot. Equating sex with immorality is a typical judeo-christian hangup. Your comment just proves ‘daniel’ right.
Worldtuner says
Rubbish, you can take it as a fact, that if you have no chance of finding a girl back home you stand little chance of a good girl here, what you need to do is stand in front of the mirror and sort yourself out, look at what any poor girl as to see.
Buzz says
lol
crazyjoe says
I have no chance to go live in Japan 🙁 but I found a really cute Japanese girl online using Tokyotimes Friends. Still trying to figure out if she has a boyfriend or not, I’m too shy to ask directly
sanam ali says
sanam ali my mobaile number 0308 3420885 0308 3229146
kevin says
Daniel, I think Japan is shinto, not buddhist.
Yes, some Japanese language skill & smiling will go a long way. And don’t pick up the first offer that comes along. Many of these gals who target foreigners have probably slept with half the expatriate population in Roppongi. Hold out and know the market as there are many different ‘types’ of girls. In this country, it is possible for a average joe to date stunning, drop dead model types if that’s your thing. Then again, ONS are also pretty good if you dig it. I personally like the 3 strikes rule – do nothing the first 2 dates, home run on the third. Some planning required.
Mark says
It’s a mix of both but only usually practiced as ritual.
Worldtuner says
No different from back home if you can’t make it the states you’ll never make it in Japan, unless you pay for it like everyone else. Having yellow fever is a real problem on the mind distorts the hard truth. Too many have been watching video porn sites and thinking it’s real.
Tom² says
kevin, Japan is shinto AND buddhist. The point here is “not christian”, anyway.
JJ, sure you’ll be more successful here than back home… Potentially. You have to get used to that thought and built up your confidence to the max – it’s a winner trait, and you’ll need some if you wanna go for the models (trust me, you do. Your wallet doesn’t, but you do.)
I’m sorry to say that the kawaii/hello kitty loving stuff is more than bold stereotypes, though. Never ever tell a Japanese girl you hate chihuahuas or Disneyland; she might just drop dead on the spot!
Smile a lot, be funny and don’t hesitate to overdo things a little bit. I think the concept of “cheesy” never reached Japan; the lousiest pick-up lines and clichés seem to work just fine.
So all you have to do is GO FOR IT !
Worldtuner says
Rubbish, to actually believe the girls just fall at your feet because you smile is really naive, lots come here with the same idea and 90% fail and so use the big mouth to express that never happened, if you just want sex pay for it, if your looking for love and a future it’ll be hard to find a good girl with whom you will support and marry into a traditional family, it’s easy to find a dumb girl with history there in every country in the world, it’s the American porn videos that gets the mind racing for you, turn the set off and wake up.
Bunny says
….and there’s always Soapland!
Bold says
Hi there!
I want to meet Japanese girl in my country, Mongolia who are like to travel to. Waiting for you! If you need I send you my pic. Our country very lovely. I had been travelled in Japan, Thailand, Caombodia, Russia, and China.Good luck
Worldtuner says
Hmm, how much you charge?
ziljianman says
Definitely true about the drop-dead model types here…easy to get a date or more by being friendly. Caution, though, it is a very different culture. A one-night stand or relationship comes with strings…a nice dinner, expensive gifts, etc…but, if you are willing to spend the money on making the lady’s evening nice, she will return the favor at the end of the day! Also, many of the “model” types are work in the entertaiment industry and very accomplished at getting into your wallet quickly. I’m now seeing a lingerie model who has also apeared in some TV commercials here. Absolutely stunning girl. I’ve learned to expect to take her to dinners at Nobu, drinks at the best clubs, and weekends at the beach staying in high-priced hotels, and buying her Coach purses and A&F clothes. But hell, where else could at 35 year old normal looking man date such a beautiful woman? Another nice plus…when you get a steady hook-up that is a true beauty, you get into all the hot places without a wait and sometimes without a cover charge. Good luck and have fun.
Mark says
shes a hooker dude your being taken. it should last about 6 months. Or maybe you prefer escort.
Worldtuner says
One night stands in any country is paid for girls, stay at home and don’t waste your money,
Too many times I’ve seen the marine broken on the club floor by the Japanese guys, for being too loud, to cocky with the girls and thinking they don’t have to pay.
JoJo says
Really? That’s probably one of my bf in the Japan getting broke on spending too much money on them. I can’t believe he does that. I support him in anyway I can to make him happy up-there and he is losing his money for them. Due to the Covid borders closed restrictions I can’t go and see him.
theotherKevin says
If you can get good looking girls in the United States, then you can get super hot girls in Japan. and thats all I gotta say about that. Japan girls go crazy if you are a buff gaijin that can speak Japanese, of course all girls have their types and not everyone one is going to like you, but a vast majority will. Trust me Ive studied abroad multiple times and have had my own share of experiences, both times the qoute un-qoute hottest girl in the school liked me , both had bfs at the time, and both still went for me like they didnt have bfs, I took one to a love hotel actually, and she still writes to me today. I just cant believe that such nice Japanese girls would just lead their Japanese bfs on, and just crumble to the gaijin bfs. It seems as if the girls always have their options open, but primarily the most unique gaijin will always turn out to be the winner.btw I am drunk right now so sorry if there are run on sentences but this just really go to me
Mark says
I disagree they don’t usually like buff guys or macho really (at least most) except to look at them and say muki muki. They like really skinny pretty guys. And if you are over 35 forgot it unless you have money and they see you as a sugar daddy. I do agree you have to be genki and geeky really. James Dean would get lots of admirers but no dates or sex. Having a wingman with you or a group is best. The model types are boring anyway. Go for the slightly dark or geeky girls who are hotties (think librarian type). You’ll have a better time. Clubs with really good dj’s (niche clubs in smaller neighborhoods) are a bad choice because the people there are really into the music and nothing else and the girls usually have boyfriends. Some of the Shibuya clubs or Ageha can be hit or miss because people are there for many reasons. But If you are enetering some Shibuya clubs you will need to go with a girl definately not 2 guys because you wont get in. The crappy dance clubs with radio type pop dance music are best for pickups because people are there to party.
In Roppongi everything changes- anyone gets whatever.
Worldtuner says
Of course every blog as to have the big mouth who’s conquered ever woman everywhere, I live in Japan and the reality is so far from the truth, they’re not easy pleasy pick up girls only the prostitutes are, It’s guys like you who give the good girls a bad name, you need to get your priorities right,
theotherKevin says
If you can get good looking girls in the United States, then you can get super hot girls in Japan. and thats all I gotta say about that. Japan girls go crazy if you are a buff gaijin that can speak Japanese, of course all girls have their types and not everyone one is going to like you, but a vast majority will. Trust me Ive studied abroad multiple times and have had my own share of experiences, both times the qoute un-qoute hottest girl in the school liked me , both had bfs at the time, and both still went for me like they didnt have bfs, I took one to a love hotel actually, and she still writes to me today. I just cant believe that such nice Japanese girls would just lead their Japanese bfs on, and just crumble to the gaijin bfs. It seems as if the girls always have their options open, but primarily the most unique gaijin will always turn out to be the winner.btw I am drunk right now so sorry if there are run on sentences but this just really go to me
Ram kumar says
Hello My dear friend you are looking so good.
with your friends group and i know you are enjoying so much.
best of luck
Parwaaz says
plz i want a japanese girlfriend because i love japanese girls and wanna make one my friend
Worldtuner says
Go back to the porn videos jerk
Ngima sherpa says
I am Ngima sherpa i am from Nepal. If you wants to make with me friendship I am ok.
Thanks you very much,
John says
Lies , lies , lies ! ok. I m livimg in Japan for 6 months now . One girl on 200 is good looking . The rest are f…. ugly ! Im sory but is true ! Screw up legs , screw up teeth , thats the norm here . Jap girls are gold digers ! be very cereful guys out there . Very cereful !
They know English ,but dont wana speak , – Japanies f……pride . Jap pride man . Still pised becouse of the WWW2 THEY LOST BIG SO……THEY ARE VERY MAD.
f…..THEM i HAVE A GOOD LOKING BLOND GIRL WITH REAL TITS , NOT FAKE , LIKE IN jAPAN . SO….
disgusted says
Sounds like you’re still mad because you just can’t get the pretty ones to give you the time of day.
“Jap” pride eh? Sounds like you’re someone with white pride you racist.
Umm…and PS…..U.S. has the highest population of fake tits, botox lips and fake blonde hair. Go home if you’re so bitter bastard.
henry says
um “John” is it, quick question whats with the bad english yourself oh wait the link for you name leads to non existant address but in China. really now bashing another country while posing as someone from another country. thats just sad. especially since Chinese ladies are just as attractive as Japanese. you sir fail are a fail and shall have your name changed to fail, or xenophobic moron wichever
meow
Cookie says
Dude you must be blind or something,japanese girls are friggin cute ya know
Georgia B says
HA,HA,HA,HA! Whats up with this guy? Im sorry man, but i can’t tell if he’s stupid or trolling. Either way, it made my morning at school bearable today. Thank you Mister Fail!
JoJo says
I agree with you however my bf in marine says they aren’t my type but are my friends. So he is taking them out, to hotels and other places. How he can be better than you guys since he got these girls out everywhere. Besides he got me very jealous and make me feel worthless due to his posts. I know I look much better than them however what makes me mad he spent money on them and always says I’m busy with my friend. He is the first bf I ever had to make me feel unattractive despite my investment in him.
Ivan says
There is absolutly no reason to mary a Jap girl . Totaly no true that they great wives . Bulshit ! They lie and they are gold digers . Its rear to see a good looking girl here .
Korians are better loking !
Get you selfs a good white girl from a small towne . thats it !
disgusted says
“Jap” girl eh?
Why are on this site then you racist. Sounds like you’re bitter too.
“they, they, they!!!”
you know….look for a good PERSON, not a good RACE
kyo says
the term “Jap” is an actual racist term against Japanese people. why can’t anyone get it into their damn heads that they’ve been insulting japanese people by referring to them as “Japs”?!?!
Kevin says
kyo, I agree with you: I can’t understand why the use of the epithet “Jap” is so pervasive amongst native Asians. The derogatory term is well known throughout the West and would never be used in civil company, but on a number of occasions I’ve encountered native-born Asians use this term without realizing it is one of the worst epithets that can be used to refer to Japanese people.
JoJo says
I wouldn’t see that word “jap” as an insult is just a shortcut from Japanese. My bf was protective towards them from me. He says girls are nice and he will hangout with them despite that he is with me. He said they know about me and they still hangout. I haven’t heard the “ jap” word but from him and then when I mentioned that another girl he hang out and call her jap girl he called me racis.
Mark says
That is his/her opinion. you have yours and they have theirs so let it be. Plus this guy is probably a troll anyway so don’t bite.
Japanese women are like certain types of alcohol you have to acquire a taste for them. The buck teeth and knees pointed inward and the big ears flat but and almost no tits and no opinion or personal thoughts normally would be a turn off but they grow on you and along with the innocence factor (or at least the fake innocence factor) and the fact they often like to take care of men and can be very sweet, can be attractive. I actually like skinnier girls now and if they have buck teeth OR slightly larger ears or ones that stick out I find them attractive. The way Japanese women’s legs taper from top to bottom is nice with a tight little ass and long legs. I like small tits as well and that they are super thin but have a little fat on em. The fat kneed girls a cant deal with or ones with bad teeth. Has anyone noticed the bad dental work here? No fluoride in the water I imagine.
Not the ideal wives people think they are for sure. People think they are submissive and will just take care of you. That may be true when dating in the fantasy stage but after…. I know so many foreigners who have divorced their Japanese wives and it is always bitter and they take the kids and dont let the husband see them. Just vindictive and spiteful.
Mark says
Its different if the couple is living in a different country though.
JoJo says
That’s why I was wondering my my marine bf is making me feel bad since I’m white and I should not feel worst than them.
ar-rabiu mohammed says
i am looking for girl friends all over the world
peter says
Jap girls ARE easy, but they enjoy it as much as you. You think you’ve ‘had’ them, but wake up Sam, they’ve actually ‘had’ you. Sixty years of mixing it with the yanks has taught them all the tricks. Here today gone tomorrow is their motto – and grab what they can while they can. If you find a beauty she’s one in a million!
disgusted says
once again…anther guy the says “jap”
“jap” girls are easy eh?
so where did you learn their motto Peter?
you think you know a country so well so you can open your mouth?
racist
No name says
You just insult Peter by calling him racist. That’s insane!!! At least he is honest.
RAM IPAAMDI says
I WANT TO HAVE JAPANESE WIFE
disgusted says
Why? Did you read a pamphlet about Japanese wives?
Mark says
Oh wait your the troll!
Stephen says
Jap girls are silly, materialistic gold diggers! They use sex to get foolish westertern men to be their sugar daddy. They are lazy, do not want to work and just want to sit at home playing video games, surfing the internet, chit chatting online to trap more men while you are working your butt off to provide for them. They demand their sugar daddy to buy them brand name gifts, trips and jewelry. So don’t be fooled by their “innocent” look, guys! I’m warning you!
disgusted says
And you know this why? You had once bad experience and you generalize?
“Jap” eh? you damn racist.
get over it.
Tony says
Never been in Japan . However, slept or dated with over 30 japanese ladies. Definetely diff culture. Most of my ladies were nice (but maybe had to do with age they were from 19-22 majority. Im in my early forties but in good shape and better than average looks. Driving a Porsche did not hurt either.
Im in love with one of them who lives in Tokyo. We have our ups and downs but writte often to each other.
I think is very important to dont lie on relationship. Treat them very nice but dont promisse things they you dont intend to do.
One of problem is Japanese never say no and you never know if they mean yes or no or what they like. My Tokyo gf will move to live with me next yr. I do have some cold feet bout that cuz not sure if it will work out. We have over 15 yrs age diff. Anyway, there are all kind of japanese girls but i found most of them polite and nice. I did also slept with some bar hosttsee (night stand ) who gave me some std which fortunately was cured. So be carefull. She was former race queen and exelent in bed :). Currently i have a 20 yr old japanese girlfriend she is nice and very sweet. I have told her one day I have to leave her and go seperate ways. (because my Tokyo gf is moving to states with idea of us getting married). Im sure some of you are thinkg im an ass.. . Im not Im a normal guy that happens to be a bit confused cuz likes more than one woman at time since his real love is so far away ;). I live in west cost USA
Any way. Im addicted to Japanese ladies . Not sure why. Maybe their politness . But my experience is limted to real young ones usually 19-21. (I have promissed my self not anymore to date anyone that young after my current gf 20yrs old goes in her way) As far as sex most of my partners has been less than average compare with latinas or other ladies.
My lady from tokyo is 28 and ready to get married. Im taking a risk cuz I never spent with her more than few days at time. So i really dont know her. But do you ever know anyone?? We know each other since 8 yrs ago. However last two yrs we saw each other many times. It worries me cuz not sure can she adapt in States?? She has to quit her job and leave her family behind.She is very close to her family. I can take care of her finacially no problem But can I take care of her emotialy?? I really dont know.
I know i love her and I want to have a kids with her. And Im ready to settle down
Anyway on good side Im a self made millionare so if things dont work out I guess I will writte her a check and call it quits.
Good luck to anyone
Mark says
You should use some of that money for English lessons.
Tony says
@Mark no time to spent money to learn english beacuse I have to make more money 🙂
Is rat race pal I have to run with ball as fast as I can as long as I can.
I speak bout 5 languages enough to communicate. (only one perfect my native one) But I think Im doing ok .
By the way made it all way by hard work and long hours . Still work 12-14 6 days a week.
You can make to if you wish to do so.
cheers
Martin says
Hi Tom,
good luck with both of your girls. I don’t see anything wrong with you seeing two girls due to the long distance, she is probably doing the same, and that’s fine as well.
Since a year has passed since your posting it would be interesting to find out how things played out.
I am also interested in dating Japanese women. I am 46 and have usually dated women much younger than I.
I don’t have to work any longer and am ready to enjoy life. I also live on the west side of the United States, Santa Monica, to be exact.
Do you, or any other reader, have any suggestions regarding where to go and get to know sweet Japanese women in the area?
Thank you and continued good luck.
Martin
Tony says
Hi Martin.
Here is my situation. My main gf from Tokyo bailed out on me . She stated first thats she could not leave family behind. USA she stated to far. Later on after I probed her foe couple weeks. She stated I was to hentai and I made her feel really really bad.
Well honestly we had a threesome once with her and budy of mine some male model. Im striaght , I asked her before we did and she seemed to enjoy it cuz was screaming like crazy.
Later on she said was all act and she could not take the dirty talk taht i agve her on bed. Hoestly iasked her several time before threesome . Are you sure you ok with it?? and she said yes.
At time I did not knwo that I wanted to amrry the girl. Later I was not upset, was one time deal anyway.
I think she fall out of love thats all.
She still email and states she miss me. I do miss her to also, we had always good time. She kinda broke my heart. And a bit my ego lol. How many sel made millonares (good looking millionares get dumped by a chick lol) not many I think.
Anyway few weeks ago she asked me if she can vist me?? I said ok.
I day later after she told me she already booked the ticket she said she cant make it cuz she have to work on dates that she wanted to come.
Go fucking figure???
I still live with me younger girl. She just turned actually 21.
Honestly I dont have same fire for her as I had for my ex currently 28 going 29. My ex tell me she is still single camt bare to date any one cuz no one can be as sweet and as nice to her as me. Honestly love and sorrow dont go together so im not sure if she still loves me or fell bad for me. I dont bug her , once a week usually I email so does she. Just recently we started to talk on phone again. (till now he said she was to sad to talk)
As far as meeting local Japanese girl, shor of Japan I sugest, japan town LA (very small). Japan guide.com , variuos star bucks or face book 🙂
good luck
Someone says
That’s what I thought. My bf is getting stiff from me because he can’t afford to get stuff for himself due these girls making him broke but he didn’t want to admit he does that. He is taking Japanese girls to hotel and have anal sex with them. They seem pretty easy wearing mini skirts to be provocative. Seriously? When I met him back in states he wasn’t even interested in sex with me as any marine should be missing his girl sexually. What a Japanese culture taught him it’s totally improper. I have never been in Japan but from all I saw what he is taking advantage of them is totally insane. I was waiting for him the entire year to see him and he didn’t even touched me.
Oktay says
Hi,
I m from Turkish,my name is Oktay,I want to meet a japan girl,ıf you want say yes,I wait from you email..my msnger adresess [email protected]
kissingg to you 🙂
Baye says
If you’re a white guy, you got it made! All you have to do is sneeze and a model will offer you a tissue (mild exaggeration, but not much.) If not, well, you might get lucky but usually you’ll be relegated to the Hip Hop skanks who have been through the entire American military. I recommend making some Japanese friends. If you’re with a Japanese guy it means you’re tamed in most girls eyes and relatively safe. Otherwise they won’t even stand near you let alone smile at you or do anything as inviting as they would for white guys. You might make some headway. You can always glam yourself up and pretend to be a producer scouting talent for a Hip hop video shoot in Tokyo. The girls might go for it. They’ll be super cute, but skanks nonetheless. But, hell, what are rubbers for. Enjoy.
http://goinglocoinyokohama.wordpress.com/
disgusted says
another expert
j'sssssssssssss says
dude im from puerto rico and i noticed a lot of hot girl in japan . but some are trustworthy
Mark says
Obviously a girl on a guys thread- Get off- Maybe you have been dumped by a white guy or many?
Tony says
Hun you are very very bitter. Who was the son of gun white guy that broke you heart??
Martin says
Probably written by a no good black guy. Blacks shouldn’t be allowed in Japan anyway, they mess up every culture, no matter where they go. One of the great things about Japan, very few blacks and Jews.
And the black SS uniform is quite popular as well.
Bonsai!!!
I'm nearly racist says
lmfao, I loved the return racism on this comment!
Mr. Tibett says
Gentlemen listen up. Just like in the United States, there are girls worth your time and then there are the crap. I met my girl who is Japanese at graduate school and we have been an item since (2003). I met her parents in the U.S. when they came down to her graduation, same as mine. Her father took us out to dinner…and they stayed wt my place. Her parents paid for me to come to Japan and stay in tokyo for 5 weeks at a hotel, all expense paid. My girl took a job at Intel KK as a business analyst in Tsukuba and I visit her every year since 2005. We travel back and forth every year and talk every day on the phone and email. She is a professional women (37, like me). We met when we were 32 ears old. We are getting married in March 2009 after I graduate from OCS (Army Officer School). I am in the National Guard in CA right now as well as a business consultant. I have met all her friends and her family loves me and I have been showere with tons of gifts and taken to expensive restaurants on her parents expense. My woman treats me very nice..and it took a while for me to get use to that, because I was married before (no kids) to a white woman who’s family disowned her until we got divorced.
You guys need to find a Japanese woman! Not the silly Shinjuki or Roppongi girls. Those girls are just like the ones you try to avoid back home in the States. Get a woman that brings something to the table. A career woman, who is not into playing games and actually has something to do other than spend daddy’s money or yours on “designer” goods. I hooked up with alot of women in the States before I met my woman and there is simply no comparison. I don’t spoil her with gifts…just treat her nice…educate her in my culture and we have a common goal.
When I walk through tokyo and see the glam girls looking at me or expect me to approach them, when I am alone, I simply be the way I am in the States, completely ignore them.
Hope this helps.
disgusted says
Mr. Tibett
Your post was almost ok.
I think you have a great woman because she’s a great woman. Not because she’s of certain race. Please just don’t generalize.
They are not a brand, company or flavor you recommend.
Mark says
In her 30’s? those are easy to find. They are desperate. Not that they should be but in Japan women 25 and over are called “Christmas cake”. Very sexist Japan.
Mark says
his post was almost ok? who the hell are you. Its easy to generalize about Japanese women because it is the most homogeneous society in the world. Not everyone is alike but there are types like Shibuya kei or Akiba kei. People tend to find a group and act in similar ways within the group especially if they are young. There are of course exceptions but grow up people don’t need to be overly politically correct and can speak their minds without you judging them.
Pete says
Thank you finally a decent reply. I am married with a Japanese woman, she is beautiful, bright, strong and career oriented. She never requested a LV bag or a fancy diner. Truth is there are as much gold digger or probably a bit more in Japan than in America, but there are tons of good women. However they won’t be treating you like a king everyday, why because they are real Japanese women not gold digger. Listen to you guys: I am 40 going out with a 22 years old girl I met in roppongi and oh no she is a gold digger. Well news for you, your 40 go to Vegas in a Lamborghini in a top club and bring back a 22 years old girl in your suit at the Venetian, what the hell to do you think she is? Well welcome to Japan its the same, Meet a girl in a coffee shop, start talking with her, she is sweet got her place, got a job and she is 28 damn might be the type of girl Mark and me are talking about. On this sheers and enjoy Japan where at least you can get a 22 years old stunner at 50 years old!
Ciao
Kevin Preston says
Hey Mr. Tibett,
Not to call you out but 35 is the max age for OCS.
I met A jap girl online and she toatlly misrepresented herself and not in status and education, she was just but ugly fat, a huge head, triangles for breasts and bad breath from an abces tooth.
The only reason I knew she was a chick was because she had her period shortly after we met here in the U.S.
I sponsered her and drove her around, I was completely nice and she wanted more. Even though she was a complete dog I treated her nice trying to find that inner beauty that everyone talks about. It was nothing but a corpse inside.
She actually emailed me to say that it wasn’t working out. I laughed.
KP
disgusted says
Wow…you just deserve some big fat karma for your post.
Once again…another once that says “jap”
reallly…where are you guys from?
digusted is a loser says
is it just me or does this guy like to make some negative comment on every post. either this guy is japanese and is paranoid about ‘jap’ racism or he is some white guy loser married to a japanese girl with mixed kids and loves japanese girls so much he is in denial of any critism. he doesn’t know his wife goes out cheating on him with a cool nice stud such as myself. don’t worry ‘disgusting’ while I may not use a condom, i promise not to cum inside her and will save it for a better place such as her face, and I promise to get her home before you get back from work so~ ^^
Mark says
Its a Japanese woman who has traveled a lot always wanted to bed a gaijin as she looks on in a sleazy Roppongi bar at the hoes picking up the white man.
“white man always get the girl”
lokohama says
Kevin, that’s hilarious…ROTFLMAO!!!
imran says
Hi I’m Imran from Pakistan but now in china student i like japanes girls
disgusted says
yeah….good for you buddy.
kyle says
As much as I really want to travel to Japan one of these days, I believe thatanywhere you go in life, Japanese girls will obtain different personalities Just like yankees girls.
It may be flattering to have a smutty Japanese girl smile at you in Roppongi, don’t just them trick you into their silly trance of love!!!! More likey, ur more and less some sort of gaijin toy or action figure that they could showcase to their friends and family.
And for you Christians out their, remember, the majority of Women in Japan have no morals, so as far as treating you like a human, they will generally treat you well only under obligation from their culture and not influnces by individual mind sets…….in other words,most of them doesn’t really understand what souls are for or lack the deep feelings we westerns pertray in pulic
disgusted says
Kyle
Go to hell. Did you really say Japaneses women have no morals? and YOU DO?????
And you know all this because???????
How the fuck do you think it’s ok to claim a certain country has no soul?
Get to know people before you open your fucking mouth you racist bastard.
And the U.S. with the shortest amount of history in this world has the most soul???……right. You need to get out more and get over yourself.
seb says
do you have to comment like that on every comment that is remotely harmful to japanese girls?
I had a Japanese girlfriend, she strung me along for about 5 months and then she broke up with me 3 days before she went back to Japan.
I understand she probably did it because of that but the fact she came up with all sorts of bullshit reasons to mask it really gave me a bad impression of her. We agreed to keep in good contact because I’ll be studying in a city near where she lives in Japan from this autumn but she has barely bothered to contact to me so.. she can fuck right off.. I actually now have a chinese girlfriend (yeah so what if I have yellow fever, sue me) and she is much more respectful, honest and just all round better than my japanese ex girlfriend.
and “disgusted” I get the feeling that you are a Japanese woman who couldn’t get any guys so you just sit here and write a dickhead reply to everybody who bad mouths japanese girls..
why don’t you try picking apart my story.. yeah i didn’t think you could.. you fucking idiot.
Chris says
I love how you picked this comment to respond to out of everything “Disgusted” has responded to, when Kyle made what is legitimately probably the most fucked up comment I’ve seen yet
Winter says
all i want to know is the mentality of japanese women regarding sex, and not just any sex but casual sex.
since i wont be in this country for too long, am not keen on getting into a relationship. but reading
everyones comments so far has been quite interesting. i wonder if any of you are in japan. it would be nice
to hook up and share ideas and experiences
Keith says
very funny indeed!!!
Ronny says
Im 42 yrs old guy.. who just endured a 4 month relationship with a japanese 21 yr old college student. i can attest to this . It was like heaven for me. i mean im 42 ! Im in great shape now but wasnt at the beginning.. kinda fat actually. I experienced the most incredible 4 months of my life… we toured New England and went to the redsox championship series.. she actually bought us game 7 tix and took me . On the other hand… after she went to Japan it was like a different person. Like Kyle states.. it seems she lacks the soul and feelings westerners portray, It has been hard for me cos she acts as if im a stanger now… and regrets me. just have fun i guess.. ??? Dont expect true love.. it is not part of their culture.. some marriages are succesfull without expectation of love. she never understood we were soulmates..and we were..The mistake i made was saying how much i loved her..
disgusted says
Ronny
True love is not part of the culture eh? Who do you think you are?
Just because you had once bad experience and you generalize and label a country as having no soul?? Your racist bastard.
Seriously you can go to hell with Kyle.
Get over it!
Mark says
Shes Canadian! oh God we have a problem Houston!
johnholmes says
It was a holiday romance for her, I m afraid. Now its back to reality to marry that J guy who works at the bank her parents approve of.
This guy I know who lives in China now said this, and its true
“With every Japanese girl I was with in Japan, I felt like I was just their vacation from their everyday drab lives”
vacations have to end sometime.
Robert says
Ronny,
I loved your story. I too met a 22 year old Japanese student when I was 36 years old and it was for me anyways the happiest time in my life. She was lovely and gentle and kind. Likewise, she went back to Japan and changed over night in her attitude to me. It was as if I’d dreamed it all and perhaps I had misunderstood…
All I can say, as an explanation to myself, is I think to be Japanese is to be unexplainable to the rest of the world. I think she was very lonely away from home and needed love. To be a Japanese girl is maybe the hardest thing in the world for their society is still very feudal and women are still not equal to men with much heart ache as they watch their fathers drift away from their mothers and feel that love lasts until you are 40…….
I guess I also helped her stay alive and fed when her money was scarce and I took a lot of the worry off her…. I know she feels a shame in this regard when all I feel is gratitudde she let me help.
I think also, when they think of settling down with a foreign man they worry will their babies look japanese which is the only look they want for their children…
If I lived life again and had to bear one mistake only it would be loving her. I hope she finds someone who loves and cares for her gentle heart. We (guys) all want old fashioned love but we want it on our modern terms with girls like her and maybe, just maybe, we forget the experience however short was worth it.
I love you Akiko:)
Mark says
She probably thought it was part of the tour package. Did you meet her outside a JTB office?
Chris says
There was nothing for her to understand, Ronny, if she didn’t believe you were soulmates, then it wasn’t meant to be, no matter how much you may have loved her
Rolfen says
I just want to say that I’ve had a similar experience with a SINGAPOREAN girl, although in a totally different geographical context.
To be honest I changed a little too, as soon as the experience switched from “vacation fantasy fling” to “potential real life relationship”.
But I didn’t become mean, cold and distant.
Just want to say that you’re not alone, and other people who have answered can attest that, and also that it’s not an exclusively Japanese thing.
If we were to try to have a wise and positive perspective, we’d say that everything comes with a price, and at least we’ve had a good time, which we would not have had otherwise.
It is pretty hard when it ends, though.
Mike says
Ronny,
I had a somewhat similar experience as you. I’m 24 now but I was dating a 26 year old Jap girl in America. She was there for a year, and I met her during her last 6 months there. Anyway I know all about the whole soul mate thing you’re talking about. It was all over once she realized she was never coming back. Things between us changed before she returned to Japan. I don’t know though, we both realized it could never work because of lots of things. I couldn’t just give up so easily though.. I was supposed to stay with her on a trip to Japan, but that didn’t work out.. It was like you said she was a totally different person.
Now I’m living in Japan. I was interested in the country before I met her so I decided to live my dream still, even without her. I had never planed on moving here before, but after a vacation here I had to come back.
Living here has given me lots of perspective on how she must have felt. I find myself thinking about how I shouldn’t fall in love here because of the problems and difficulties it would entail. At the same time, sometimes I think I could just stay here indefinitely, but is that what I really want? I think I would really miss home being gone for a long time. I don’t know how to describe it but I really do understand why she did what she did now that I’m in the same situation.
Finally, I would like to say that what you say about Japanese people having no souls or whatever just isn’t true. For the most part people here are no different that back home, well in the sense there are selfish assholes and nice people that actually care about others. Not just because of social pressure. The selfish ones are just harder to pick out here. There are a few people here that I have that will probably be friends for life. Not many, but that true back home too. Just date a girl from the country and you’ll do fine. Just like back home. haha.
disgusted says
Stay there longer and you will understand the culture and the “soul” all the other racist bastards are claiming Japan doesn’t have.
Whatever experience you had with a girl…don’t generalize and judge a culture.
Why you felt the need to share a “japanese” relationships experience on this site…i don’t know…it’s like you’re sharing an experience on how a certain dish tasted…
anyhoo….FYI “Jap” is not ok
Mark says
Japanese people treat gaijin like a brand so why cant gaijin treat Japanese women the same. How long do you need to stay? A lot of people in Japan are soulless I agree. They have had their souls sucked out of them. So many situations where “giri” is involved and where you cant express your opinions and be yourself. Always a group mentality. People really have to work hard to break out of this cultural fact. They even “type” themselves by blood type. People are expected to act a certain way or may not get that job just because they have a certain blood type. Again Japan is the easiest to generalize with. Generalizing is not bad or racist. But culturally the Japanese know a lot about racism with the concept of proper place. They believed that every race had a purpose and of course the Japanese were at the top as rulers. Maybe the average person wouldn’t believe this now but it is in the history and was an influence during the war when treating prisoners in other countries so poorly and committing the atrocities they did at Nanking and other places.
D'ANDRE LEWIS says
Hello im D’ANDRE LEWIS I’m not from there but i really love all tokyo girls they are so sexy and preety i wish i can have all of them well not all but some i really but thats all love you all down there and ya’ll have a nice place but thats all see you later and this is my cell number 9144592 tell all the girls to call me thanks
disgusted says
perv
Rod McDonald says
I will be some where in Tokyo in 3 weeks.Does anyone have a must do list?
disgusted says
Get to know real people….not the stereotype
Mark says
In Tokyo? impossible they are all tsumetai!
seb says
fuck off
samrat gs9 says
if you find me,japanese girl,its your luck not mine
Brian says
Looking for a Japanese girl friend 30 – 40 years old living some were close to Misawa, AB. [email protected]
Lookin for a japanise girl 25-40 im yong guy 24 m says
now stayin in tokyo u can call in my sel ph 08038961295
Yikes says
wow, so many of you guys sound like you’re either the kind who can’t get laid “back home” and the rest seem downright bitter! there were a couple of you who seemed realistic and down-to-earth, but dang, a scary lot! I’m sure many of you guys go to Japan expecting to find love and plenty of sex..well get over it and don’t blame the “jap girls”. they’re no different than the white ho’s back home! Asia in general is the kind of place where money talks, or so it would seem moreso on the surface but it’s not that different from anywhere else. however, part of japanese culture is that people don’t show their true minds but will go along with something despite how they really feel–not a whole lot if individualism is encouraged here. furthermore, they are a highly developed society and of course money is important! it’s like that everywhere! you should know this before going to a place like Japan, and not expect so much. finally, I have to agree that Korean gals are WAAAY better looking than japanese ones–and they’re at least worth the headaches, though they can be evil as well! if you’re fool enough to fall for it, whether from J or K gal, then that’s YOUR fault. don’t blame these girls for trying to have fun and get what they want. not like you’re going in with innocent intentions! you’re just as much to blame. to all you white guys: stop expecting some tame lotus flower!
disgusted says
Thank you for post….I think.
disgusted says
Thank you for your post….I think.
Dennis says
Alright, let me add a more down-to-earth comment to this subject. I am currently trying out a long distance relationship with a Japanese woman. I met her by accident in my homeland when she was on vacation by herself. I completely fell for her, and luckily she fell for me as well. I just want to make some breathing space for curious men out there: Not every J-girl thinks only about Louis Vuitton purses or has to call everything kawaii. Although indeed this culture is based more on being cute, rather than sexy (which I can only encourage) there are plenty more down to earth women out there with whom you can have normal conversations and who can act like adults. My girlfriend is an example of this.
Secondly, if you, as a foreigner, are looking for a Japanese woman, you should perhaps not learn too much and adapt too much to the Japanese culture. Women who will fall for foreign men will usually have a more free spirit and they will understand that you are a stranger to their ways and means. Don’t try to adapt, they will think you are insecure and weak. I never adapted to her way of life. The only thing I sorta got hooked on was the Japanese food. It’s awesome.
I think one of the reasons that this woman (who is eight years older than me) fell for me is because of my confidence and lack of adapting. I have never been desparate to meet her, she just crossed my path one day. I showed her around in my country for a few days, we became friends, and so it continued to love eventually. What I’m trying to say is this: Don’t look for Japanese women specifically. They come in nice and less nice versions just like any other culture. Although they look much more polite and friendly on the outside, they will only show you their true selves after some time. I used to think my girlfriend was such a shy girl. Until we got more intimate. She is a wild woman, she is naughty, she will tease me every chance she gets and she wants me to tease her. I heard this one day, I don’t know in how far it’s true: Japanese women want you to be secure about yourself, they rather want you to tease them then tell them how much you like them all day long. They’d rather see you being independent of them than clinging on to them too much.
Hope this makes up for the comments before me. Once again, I am not a J-girl hunter. I never really thought about having a Japanese girlfriend until this year. Although I did always admire their beauty. I did have a general interest in Japanese culture, but that’s basically as far as I go.
johnholmes says
I m not trying to rain on your parade but one reason she fell for you is because she is 8 years older than you. This means 1. she is a bit more mature; dont expect adult behavaiour from Japanese until they are at least 30.
2. More distrubingly, Japan is a youth cult. Older men are all after schoolgirls or at least younger women. what is surprising is that the women are too, and have watched too many episodes of “Sex and the City”. Not that they usually get that younger man, though, but what are host clubs for?
3. Connected to 2. there is the anglophile type; an older J woman who goes to London, or NY etc specifically to get it on with younger men. Think ageing pop star Matsuda Seiko and Jeff the NY waiter.
4. there is pressure on Japanese women to get married by a certain age. 30 being the usual deadline, after which they are called “loser dogs”.
I m not saying she doesnt love you, but I am saying that Japanese have less freewill to act that western societies because of their traditionally repressive society. So she has a variety of reasons for falling for you, and thats fine.
disgusted says
and you know this because……..???
good to know that you’ve “studied” the Japanese culture enough to give such sound advice. Look at the girls in your own country before you judge girls oversees you ass.
disgusted says
Dennis..
I appreciate your post and that you were not looking “specifically” for a Japanese girl AND for not being racist. You fell for a person and not a stereotype. Hope it’s going well.
Just one thing…I don’t know why you posted on this site after reading all of the other horrible racist posts before you. Girls of different races are not a brand or flavor that white men decide to try and then share their experiences with others. Don’t think you will be posting your dating experience with a white girl.
In any case…good luck to you.
Mark says
Canadian Bitch! for sure. You suck ass. How are people being racist by making comments based on their own personal experience with Japanese women. Get over yourself. They may be acting chauvinistic or abusive but not racist. That term is over used and really race has no significant social meaning anymore. Among humans, race has no cladistic significance—all people belong to the same hominid subspecies, Homo sapiens sapiens. Black,white, asian are races. I dont consider Japanese as a race but a people group. 99% live in Japan on an island with very little influence from the outside world because hardly any gaijin live here (less than 1%). Also Japan is very rule oriented and if you step out of bounds you will be shamed and scolded (except for smokers they seem to be exempt). Therefore Japanes usually act very predictably (yes of course there are exceptions but they are rare). This is one reason Japanese people have trouble in some circumstances dealing with gaijin and refuse them apartments (if you want call someone racist- and I have been refused an apartment even with my Japanese wife) or entry to certain places. Gaijin are notoriously unpredictable probably because they come from several different places and cultures (even though the Japanese treat anyone who isn’t Japanese as other).
The comment about posting about a white girl is ridiculous. Like I said Japanese come from Japan a homogeneous nation. White girls can come from any number of different countries and are actually a race if we hold to the typical accepted divisions of black, white, asian. If you want a comparison compare Japanese girls to white girls in say Canada but even then it isn’t a good comparison because there are a lot of immigrants with different cultural influences which is different than Japan. Japanese people only usually speak Japanese and live in Japan their whole lives and never move so they have a very strong influence of a homogeneous island culture more like an amazon village or something. They can read about places and visit but it is always with a Japanese world view.
In summary get over yourself!
Mark says
I have nothing against Canadian girls I am only guessing this person is Canadian because they used eh! in several posts I could actually be wrong!
sam says
I am living in japan for 2 years now. To tell the truth i have not tried for many japanese girls, but i can understand their nature and they are homogenous and i think most of them have no soul. “disgusted” i dont know who you are or how much you have studied japanese culture or how much longer you have stayed in japan but i think you have closed your eyes and stopped looking into reality. Japanese people who went outside of japan for 5 to 10 years and came back to japan have the same image as i or mark or many other have. On the other part it is not racial comment neither i am white or black. I am asian but to tell the truth japanese dont even consider some of the countries as asian even if they are asian like shrilanka or india or pakistan. What will you call this?
The Envoy says
So your advice, Lee, would be to join in the chorus “Kawaiiiiiiiiiii neko chan!”?
hayden says
the talk here sounds like ur treating them as objects to be bought especialy the people at the begining of this.
if girls know you like this only the sluts will still want in, but im sure you peopl at the top find that just fine.
Mark says
This is a better response for disgusted. She is offended that they are treating people as objects the racism comment has no basis really.
disgusted says
For all you f***ing racist bastards out there. I just read all of your posts and am just speechless and disgusted. First of all, what makes you guys so different from them if you’re going out there looking specifically for an asian girl? What… you think you’re gonna get it good because they’re gonna rub your feet, pour you a drink and be your sex slave? If you were looking for a specific race to date and grab to first asian you see, obviously you’re not trying to fall in love….so you all deserved what you got. There are gold-diggers everywhere. Asian, white, latin or black…if you treat them like a whore, they’re gonna suck every penny outta ya. That makes women smarter than you. You call them materialistic? Look in the mirror guys. YOU are materializing them. So, what about the blonde bimbos strolling down Beverly Hills with their fake boobs and botox face spending their sugar daddy’s money? The 16 year olds on myspace or adult friendfinder sites trying to get a lay from older guys?
Think before you speak assholes.
Here are some tips for you close minded sick pervs.
1) Do your homework first before you judge a country. If you think the US is the most ”soulful” country in this world, you need to get out more or maybe get an education. How are you guys expecting to really connect with these people if you can’t even communicate with them? Every other country in this world EXCEPT the US has real history going back thousands of years, so claiming a certain country to not have soul is probably something you don’t want to say…
2) It’s OBVIOUS that all of you have only been to Tokyo and basing your opinion on one little city or one girl that actually gave you the time of day. Have you been to the rest of the country? Have you seen the country side? Have you talked to the elderly that survived the war? Have you gotten to know a family? A mother and father who will pour sweat, tears and blood to support and love their family? You visit a website, read an article or visit a country for a few months and you think you know it all? Seriously guys.
3) It’s not ok to call them “japs”
You all are probably the types that claim you’re opened minded, cultured and never racist. What you need to understand is that it’s not the obvious things. It’s these subtle things that make you racist. “japs are better!” “japs are whore with no soul!”
“koreans are better!” “I want an asian girl!” ‘White girls are better!” “they have no morals!”
Wow people…..you all deserve karma
johnholmes says
What… you think you’re gonna get it good because they’re gonna rub your feet, pour you a drink and be your sex slave?
haha, I WISH. They tend to only do that for Japanese husbands who work in a high paid job. The “contract” between them is that he is the bread winner who works himself to death to pay those rising taxes and insurances for wifey, who puts his slippers on when he comes home and collapses in an armchair, exhausted.
(too exhausted for sex, but thats ok, she didnt really fancy him that much anyway. but she wants to please her parents, and he does have a good job even though hes got chronic halitosis.)
OK, I m being mean but I ve seen all of the above at close hand.
Douglas MacArthur says
Disgusted,
I feel your pain. You are an idealist. Eventually, you will become a realist and a proponent of Eugenics. I have. Don’t waste your energy on the lost in the dark.
Douglas MacArthur says
See the one below. It was meant for you (too many beers at happy hour).
Douglas MacArthur says
Okay~~ Hopefully, I get this pasted in the right place.
Disgusted, you are burning too many calories. There is a Confucias (spelling probably off) saying, The Teacher will appear, when the Student is ready. And Dude, the majority of humanity is just not ready for your idealistict…. gosh.. Uh.. you know.. they don’t. They obectify… Anyway.. I am going to have another beer.
Wish you could join me. We’d have some good arguments. Oh.. I am pasting this hoping you will get it.
Disgusted,
I feel your pain. You are an idealist. Eventually, you will become a realist and a proponent of Eugenics. I have. Don’t waste your energy on the lost in the dark.
N-american says
why does everybody not care about the native americans who were around for 16,000 so get your facts straight before you say that america has no soul i agree with you though about all these people just wanting to get laid by a japanese girl and to all you people who have been judging japan based off one person or one city try going to other citys in japan then just tokyo and all girls are not the same
Mark says
People are talking about J-girls that doesn’t mean Japanese girls necessarily. The types of girls foreigners meet mostly in bars really.
Who cares about the old lady in Gunma who survived the war (the war the Japanese started by the by- cant understand all the sympathy for the war mongers- and yes there was a citizen militia where all citizens were to kill all foreigners when they entered Japan)
Anywho people don’t want to date the old lady( unless your into that I can recommend a place in kabukicho but I am sure she is nice.
I dont understand why YOU are posting on this thread! all the other comments are about dating Japanese women and you haven’t contributed any story or experience to support your theories that they have souls or anything else. Which again makes me think you were a Canadian English teacher for 1 or 2 years in the country side- big deal- stay past the romance stage and then come talk to me after you have been cornered by the police or refused an apartment or searched illegally and have had bad experiences with souless J-girls.
Also nobody said any other place was better or different.
Mark says
People have fantasies so what- Japanese girl in kimono(nothing on underneath) irashaimase- can I rub your (bleep). so what
Keith says
I agree with you, your view is splendid and get the point~
Rolfen says
Dude,
Your efforts are laudable. I’ve had my bad times, and have resorted to stereotyping, and demeaning, and maybe even racists remarks (although I doubt it – I have principles) a couple of times – but very rarely overall. I would have reasons to do such things, but I don’t.
I just ignore these poor bastards, they’re probably either having one of these outbursts (I guess) we all have been guilty of at some point of our lives (although to different extents), or are just acting out of jealousy for the sweet stuff, without having ever tasted the bitter stuff. I figure out the natural thing to do is ignore them. If they keep doing this, they’ll probably consume themselves and torture themselves in their own hatred and ignorance.
SaNj says
want japanese girlfriend………….who also can speak english a little cause my japanese in not perfect.now i am in takamatsu.
Douglas MacArthur says
Dork~
johnholmes says
To disgusted:
I ve been in Japan for 15 years and base my observations on the hundreds of women I have encountered closely. I speak Japanese and am a director of a Japanese company, though I m tired of it.
There are some good ones, but the culture gets in the way. I ve had my heart broken twice by Japanese parents refusing to let their daughter marry a foreigner, so who is racist? They are.
Peace
Tony says
Just curious . Twice parents did not want. How bout the lady?? Could she make a decision on her own?? Im facing similar situation but my girl she said she will not ask them cuz she is sure they will say no:) . (I have no clue how she will pull it off cus she is so freeking tight with her family)
Sorry for typos English is not my native language. European born here.
But I tell you this is some mystery on these sparking eys and smiles. Something that unfurtunately I was not able to find or encounter on caucasian ladies with whom I had a fair shair of relationships and dramas.
So now at mid forties and over hundred of encounters and relationships I find myself single never married and hoping this will be “the one” the perfect one. Boy boy Im setting myself for a big disappointed you would think by now I would know better. 🙂
I guess the Porsche turbo and money doesnt cut it anymore I need some major headache lol. (she is 28)
Mark says
That should tell you something that she is expected to ASK PERMISSION from the parents.
Chris says
Call me old fashioned, but I would prefer to have her parents’ blessing before I married a women
Tony says
@John .
Just finding out my girl parents are on my way :).
Seems I will be joing the company of many others .
The good thing is my heart doesnt break easy. (former political prisoner, former military) so seen few things on my life.
After all life goes on and is all good.
Cheers
tony says
John you are right on money.
1) I think sex and city have these japanese ladies really fu.. up in head.
2) They are so tight to family they can even move we the gajin are not good for them.
My Gf that was moving in States “with idea going to school and getting married”
Just sent me an email that she cant leave her family.
I was so close to tell her “fuck your family” but I bite my tongue. So three months away from moving she gets cold feet and we are done.
Since im not a youngenster any more I will not fall for same shit twice. I will fuck them if they get in my way but marrying one wasurete (maybe wrong spelling but means forget it)
Thz God I did not have kid w ith her cuz image few yrs from now she gets pissed and take kids with her and Japan will not give you kids back no matter what. Sayonara Nijon I will not get fooled twice 🙂
nihonteki77 says
I also loathe the word “jap.” It’s a very distasteful word. There seems to be a tremendous amount of ignorance regarding Japanese culture and women in this blog. I think johnholmes has some of the most intelligent statements of anyone.
Japanese people are generally very kind, and hospitable. It is an aging nation, because of low birth rates, where nearly one quarter of the population is over 65. Fewer young people are forced to work many more hours to make up the difference for all the retirees.
As to the women, they are not all interested in foreigners, not by a long shot. In the Tokyo area, you may experience a substantial interest by many of the younger girls especially, but consider yourself more of a novelty item than someone they would consider taking home to mommy and daddy. The lower caliber girls, especially young women (18-24) or so are fancied by fashion and glitz and glamour. Suffice it to say, if you’re a strapping man with lots of money, you shouldn’t have much trouble attracting your share of young gold diggers. If you’re looking for a higher caliber women, then your facing as much of a challenge in Japan as in your native country most likely.
My fiancé is Japanese, and I see all of her friends, most of whom probably fit this stereotype. The thing to remember though, is that these are all just that, stereotypes. Back to what I said at the beginning. Japanese people tend to be very friendly and hospitable, which may come off to some as some sort of erotic interest, when in fact they are just being nice.
Rule of thumb: DON’T READ TOO MUCH INTO IT!!
Remember, it’s a different culture. Treat the people with respect and kindness and expect the same in return. Cheers!
johnholmes says
I agree with all of the above, except this bit:
“Remember, it’s a different culture. Treat the people with respect and kindness and expect the same in return. Cheers!”
NO.
You cant “expect” that from the Japanese in return. You might get it, you might not. Its fair to say you ll get back a lot less than you put out (unless you just mean shopkeepers being polite). Talking about females more likely they ll take your free dinner or gaijin experience then disappear; they will NEVER take you out to dunner in return, dream on on that one!
There is another blog on topix where someone writes they (the young women) will “exploit western kindness so dont bother”.
“Western kindness” means things like giving a stranger a spare umbrella in a downpour, or actually helping some girl being abused by a homeless drunk on the train.
Why? Because in Japan you re not supposed to help. You ll embarrass them, it draws attention to them in public, it shames them. You re supposed to ignore them at all times. Sounds weird I know, heartless and inhuman even. Its why I m leaving.
Also, Japanese never want to incur “giri” or obligation, to people. Especially strangers. So they ll turn down your request for the umbrella, OR take it grudgingly and never return it (because thats “giri”).
I also tend to feel that this is due to Confucian and western ideals being at odds. Confucian values mean you have to respect EVERYONE, even if they re a doddering old fool. In the west, respect is more earned. I sometimes feel Japanese actually have a big ego and want the respect from you that they dont deserve. They want to be treated with deference just because they work at such and such a company or go to a famous university, or because their husband is a doctor.
The last one is based on something that really happened when i was a lowly teacher. I level checked this lady who was married to a doctor at a lower level than she felt she was entitled to be at; her husband even came into the school to complain and said “I am a doctor at blah hospital so WHY is my wife only low intermediate?”
Japan also desperately wants western respect at all levels; this goes back to the Meiji era. Japan’s quest for an empire was to emulate the west and gain respect, even while western empires were on the wane in the 30s, being replaced with more liberal attitudes.
But they want it on their terms, ie. G8 membership and seat on the security council but while continuing to hunt whales for the sake of it and not sign the Hague Convention on child abduction, etc etc etc.
I ve wandered a bit here but I do see a parallel between the respect they seem to expect, on all levels, but perhaps dont always “deserve”. E.g. the Ojisan (older man) on the street who thinks he can tell you what to do, the Japanese idol singer (Matsuda, Utada, etc) who thinks American success is owed to her because Japanese music products sell, etc etc.
Or the tall dyed blonde gym instructor who thinks I owe her dinner, drinks and love hotel costs, even though she forgot my birthday and shes really not that good looking, and doesnt seem to realise I m not that interested in forking out that kind of money for her. lol.
Her attitude dates back to Japan’s economic glory days (“my boyfriends have always paid for me”) and J-women are trying to maintain that lifestyle…..
…by all means necessary, in some cases!
Mark says
“consider yourself more of a novelty item than someone they would consider taking home to mommy and daddy. ”
so the objectifying goes both ways
I think people are spot on as far as their experiences with J-girls not ignorant. Just because you disagree with their opinions and conclusions based on their experiences doesn’t make them ignorant. The problem is gaijin dont enter society on the same level or in the same social circles as Japanese. We didnt go to the same schools for one which is huge. I have been to numerous bonenkai yearly with a Japanese friend. They just have huge social circles and people set each other up. As gaijin that wont happen. Although I have a Japanese friend (woman) who has a thing for Canadian guys because she lived their for a year. Talk about branding.
Notamerican says
I’m a finnish guy so i cannot say about culture diffrences between japanese and amercans but i think that finnish people may understand japansese thinking better than americans.
I have been in Fukuoka in last summer fot three weeks and i have to say that japanese girls are not two faced golddiggers. Finland is high developed country like japan and most of western countries so have to say t´most of them won’t need your money. And golddiggers are everywhere.
You talking about girls who treat you like a toy and broke your hearts. I have to say that it’s not only japanese girls. I think it’s everywhere in countres which have homogenous population.
I have friend from India and he lives in finland like i do. He said to me that its se hard to find a finnsh gf.
He told that most of finnish girls using him as a toy just like some guys told me about japanese girls. Now he have a good finnish girlfriend and he is so happy, He told me that in indian culture people don’t wat that their children marry to non indian. His father thinks thatt al finnish women are cheating sluts with problems with alcohol. that isn’t true and it hearts me a lot.
But its totally same when peolple here say that japanese women have no soul etc.
Finnish girls are same like players. And you have to remember that you are from another race so some girls want only sex and fun. But they want real relationship only japanese guy. It’s not so easy live with foreigner in homogenous society. People from another race in finland are in samelike situation. Racism is not so nice thing against you and your fiancee.
I lived with host family in Fukuoka and i talking alot about japanese women. They told me that people in western societies are more adult than japanese. I am 23 now and i think its better to date older women in japan. So maybe it’s better dat with older ones.
But it depents. And i have some friends in japan (all are women). Thats true that they are different in Japan. In other countries they are more polite. But they are like every women in the world. I couldn’t understand how some men talking them like they are some monsters.
Please don’t generalize people because they acting different than you amercans.
And dont think that people thinks that americans are good people. In europe some people says that you are really twofaced and it’s dangerous trust what you are saying.
Think about that. Are you liars?
Personally have to say that before i went to japan i didn’t know what is beatiful woman. I just love their beauty and i love how they act. I just love them…
I’m not native speaker of english so i’m very sorry about my mistakes with language
Cheers
Mark says
Your 23
spent 3 weeks in Fukuoka? Yah nice romantic vacation. You were a visitor so you got the best. Its the mystery of the new oriental experience!
No offense but you are a kid.
I spent 6 weeks my first trip here and I loved everything about it. I was 29. When I went into schools girls would cry because they were so shy and happy to meet me. This was a big city Kobe. My ego got pumped!
some important facts I knew some people and they introduced me to several people so it was like a party and I was the star. People in Japan want to show you the best sides of Japan but…
remember the old saying about visitors. They are like fish. After 3 days they start to stink.
I stayed on longer than my hosts expected me to- not with them mind you. After that everyone went back to their schedules and the part was over. Couldn’t even get someone to help me out with references for a job. The longer you stay the more bad experiences you will have.
People in Tokyo are cold. Its too big. America is very friendly in comparison. Last time I went back home I came through the Dallas airport and thought the TSA was going to invite me for dinner. It was weird in comparison. Japan on the surface is polite and accommodating but it is a job there is no personal touch. Of course there are many negative things about America.
“I think it’s everywhere in countres which have homogenous population.”
Martin says
The U.S. is the most two-faced country there is. Americans are fake, arrogant, and for the most part utterly dumb. Multi-culti doesn’t work.
Oh really says
Yeah,some people on America are freaking two faced,like Steve Jobs which you guys all respect and worship.you all praise him and whatsoever for his iPhone and iOS but fail to think of the guy which invented the phone in the first place.Reports have talked about him although very talented and innovative,he doesn’t treat his working partners and workers well.If you do not benefit him,you’re just a piece of sh*t in his eyes
Mark says
“I think it’s everywhere in countres which have homogenous population.”
I agree with this statement completely maybe Finland is similar.
Tatsuhiko Shido says
first, excuse my inelegant post, doing this by mobile web. second, i’m not japanese (at least this incarnation anyway) & have not been there or dated any women from there. however, i have been interested in the land, language, culture & it’s people for years. there is certainly ”soul” to be found. it’s not always great, but that’s true anywhere. japan is no heaven, there is racism there too. but it’s no hell either. i admit to looking for a japanese woman to date, but it’s more than looks. i probably…
Tatsuhiko Shido says
..have more commonality with *some* japanese women than i do with the vast majority of women here in the west. i’ve no interest in the type that control freaks dream of either. fancying the likes of shena ringo for example should do well to speak of the kind of women i like. strong, intelligent & yes, gorgeous iconoclasts. badass, at times a bit crazy in a good way & hopefully very mature & loving. it’s hard to find a good match anywhere. are looks a factor? sure. anyone says otherwise is lying…
Tatsuhiko Shido says
..but for me, it’s about so much more than that. call me naive, but i’m looking for true love, not a casual dalliance. plus a there are a number of other things which also makes a bit of practical sense. but there is a stigma for favoring japanese (or any asian) women. as there likely is for interested women, especially if they feel just as serious about their partner. ah, well that’s life. adaiyo.
Douglas MacArthru says
Dude~. You are Naive~ Good luck.
Mark says
If you haven’t even been there or dated a Japanese girl how can you comment on the subject?
Pez says
I am currently teaching English in Japan and this is my second trip here. All I can say really is that if you want to meet decent girls, you wont do so at dodgy gaijin bars in the centre of the city. The decent Japanese girls are out in the suburbs with their family. If you insist on picking up girls in the gaijin bars, you will end up with dirty skanks that have fucked every single marine in the area.
You look into their eyes and can’t believe that such a cute and innocent looking girl (even the 30 year olds look like they’re 13) could have a bad bone in her body, but trust me, there are plenty of evil, money grubbing sluts prowling the streets. I wont be like the rest of the posters on this board and say that it’s because they’re Japanese – I’ll go one step further and say it’s because they’re females, and if you haven’t worked it out yet, that’s what females are like. If you want your wallet to be drained and don’t care that these girls have fucked everybody, then go right ahead. They will seem like the kind, caring type, but it’s just the game they play to get their claws into foreign men.
That said though, if you’re after a relationship, there are plenty of decent girls on offer – you just have to look in different places than you would in the USA or UK or wherever you’re from. If you’re living in the country you will have a great chance to do this. Leave the dirty whores to the marines who have no choice but to go where they know – ie. go to the gaijin bars, which is where the predator types will lie in wait with beads of spittle popping out their gnarled, dried up lips. Drinking at bars is not part of Japanese culture, so most of the Japanese don’t do it. Try your best to meet women through other avenues… You wont regret it.
jon says
hi i can’t comment too much on this topic as i have only visited japan twice on holidays, i 100% agree with johnholmes mind you and to be honest couldnt really add much more to his posts, he has a very level head in this quite frankly crazy arguement.
but i will say this to disgusted i understand some of you rants to people using “jap” and other racist terms but seriously man you go on and on about generalization and such, but even some of your comments on here to people sharing their life experiences and trying to broaden the conversation to more than just a mindless slagging match have been “to be fair” quite rude, it seems to me that maybe you have had bitter experiences with such matters because you yourself seem to have a lot of pent up anger and rage, i would like to thank some of the comments left on here about their life experiences with partners from japan because i came on here trying to find out if the stigma about japanese women etc was true and to read about real life experiences and as usual which is true to most internet rubbish it has turned into an arguement.
so to close this up thankyou to the people who have be open and honest, to so “so called racists”, who might i add probably dont realise “jap” is offensive to some, broaden your knowledge of what is acceptable and what is not when speaking about others and to disgusted, stop spending your life on the internet raging at people who are only expressing their views and seriously go out and enjoy life.
Peace
sid says
hi,
i want a japan girl friend
Stu says
Great. Get in line.
Jaz says
ROFLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLL I actually find it friggin hilarious that after all these serious discussion some random person would say ‘im from xyz i like japan girl where can i get’.
Not bad to diffuse the tension on this thread actually.
Back off says
Move off,you’re in the way
Tony says
Well let me run this again with few addition. Never been to Japan. Slept or dated with at least 30 Japanese ladies. My experince is limited to ages 19-21 usually.
Most of themn were polite very clean and generally trustworthy. I”m atracted on petite ladies and most of them were petite. I had from one night stands to relationships with them . Few of them were a chotto hentai. (little kinkey). Met one one time and on first date we had a thresome MMF and she liked it. One of them a former race queen gave me an std which was cured thz god. I learned lesson and started to use rubber after that with pretty much all of them. Another one (i met one book store) when I and my male model friend were hunting 🙂 ended up sleeping with both of us in diff days. (she was going to grad school in usa).
Met another another one that she acted she really loved me or at least liked me but than when I chatted with her under diff chat r00m nick name she stated she was embarrased she dated me and felt like a hooker. (she was 19 at time I was 44).
Now i always took care of them I usually drive around in porsche and wear d@G or desinger stuff. Since my pool is limited to younger crowd and new in USA I really cant make much of comments. Most of them were some what average in bed. Except the race queen from whom I inhereted Std.
Now I been been with all types. I say japanese stand out cuz very very polite.
Is hard to really know what they think. i think is in their culture to never say no.
Im in love with one (that i hope to marry) and I like one with whom I live. Yeah i know kinda screw it situation. Most of japanese ladies i been have been very very trustful. (as far money goes you can have around thou and they never touch anything)
Than again my pool is limited . Some tokyo hustler chick Im sure can clean your valet in no time. I met my love vacation in Hawai 8 yrs ago.
I was in rocky relationship. (living with hot white chick that I was sure was cheating on me). Just had a meniscus tear. Just had to do bk right after 9-11. So I was broke
Long story short she was gorgeus (japanese lady) 19 and I felt in love in first sight.
Yrs later we conected again . For yrs we exchanged emails. She is mature now late 20ties . Im older but not broke anymore:). Hard work paid off and I became selfmade millionare. She will move to USA (gods willing next yr) we talk bout kids and marriage. I hope it will work. I hope Im not stuck in a fantasy world. Im a bit worry cuz she is to tight to her family and her job. I will do my best to support her emmotianlly . Cuz finances will not be a problem. In end Im kinda of guy that wins with any cost. meaning if doesnt work out . I will be heart broken but I will survive. I will writte her a fat check and life will go on.
My advise to you gusy wanting J GF. Take it easy, be polite, be yourself, and depends what you looking for like in any culture you have chicks from carzy hentai to regular one. Just like us guys:)
Mark says
comment after you have been in Japan and dated them in their native land- everything changes.
Tony says
@Mark.
Well seems you really love this place lol. Mark if I go and visit I assure you I will tear them apart lol. 21-25 thats all. I might do it maybe sooner than I think.
I have to agree with majority here. Japanese ladies seems to be fu.. up in head. I guess no one kisses or hugs them when they are young so they dont know what love is. Sex what sex they will state “good experience” god knows what they mean. They say one thing mean another. Anyway good luck to you all . I think I switch to my own kind where shit means shit and love means love
japanese language gakusei says
you sound like an old fart, get a life…and stop sleeping around like a male gigolo, and stop commenting i did this i did that, no one wants to hear you out….and give that designer stuff to a person who really needs it….
And yes! You really need to get a life…
Tony says
@Japanese gakusei.
@some point everyone will be an old fart 🙂 it depends how that person feels. For the record my dad is 75 and just asked me for some porn dvd lol. So I got way way to go lol.
You dont have to hear or read my stories .
cheers
alauddin says
My name is Alauddin
I like japanis
I want japanis garl frend
japanese language gakusei says
are you a desparado?
japanese language gakusei says
aight, first off,
can someone tell me how can i improve my japanese, does watching nihongo movies improve one’s spoken language skills??
And yes….i think japanese are good people..but i guess, like always!there are some rotten tomatoes in a dozen…
The question is. Is it difficult to find a job in japan? Something connected to the management line?
And lets not talk about the girls, they are the same anywhere, Gold diggers? Are u crazy? Every girl does that…thats some shit u guys put up there for japanese chics…
Tony says
Job in Japan if you are white boy I would say save it. Japanese are big time racist (look at Johnholmes posts). Yeah as a novelty they will fuckk you and say good experince. I think is hard to find a Japanese with soul. Than again read Johnholmes posts he is the best describing them. And no pal not every girl is gold digger in japan or here. Why you wana improve your japanese?? The japanese are a dying race at some point they will go excint . They dont fuc… they dont have babies their population is slowly decreassing . I have met some really classy one in usa (wifes of friends ) they were in late thirties or fourties even them say the new generation has changed. After the deflation every thing changed . Anyway good luck
japanese language gakusei says
ahh tony thanks,
well, after all that criticism u did reply, so thanks for that..
Im learning japanese because i love the culture, food and stuff, wanna make a living there, like i suppose you made yours?
im just done with n4, started n3 preps a week ago. Im an Indian but people end up asking if im a japanese, and yea, i really dont look like and Indian 😀
so anyways, really hoping from some nihon action>Real Soon<
Tony says
Got it . Im sure you will be fine. Indians are generally very hard workers so you will be fine. Well i think would been better if you did not look like Japanese lol. (nothing wrong with their look ut would had made you more of “rare catch lol”
have fun and good luck
Itachi says
Not only movies, for example, i have 17 with half right now, but i can give you some small advice in improving Japanese language, i like very much to watch anime, and i heard many words that are often repeated in many anime’s places, for example, before eating something they say “itadikimasu” which means “thanks for the meal” and when i hear it many times in they original language and reading only subtitles i have learned few their popular and average words, and i have memorized just by listening and reading subtitles, the same is with “sorry” – “gomennasai” there is alternative word too “suimasen” which means “sorry, excuse me”, but often used is “gomennasai”, “thank you” – “arigato” and some few more, few i need to repeat more, because i forgot some easy words, i forgot many times how was “thank you” ,but now i know it as my own language, but i really want to learn full Japanese, so i think when i’m going in collage, then i think i will start to learning, and at the same time i will be learning writing too, so it’s very possible to learn by listening and reading the translation of it and watching more on random types and some words will be often repeated and you will slowly memorize them, first you will real it, but with out understanding you won’t learn it, i learned because i wanted to understand the meaning of that specific anime and somehow listening the same word and reading the translation in got stuck in my head and i simply know it right now, but i still have much to learn, even slightest word adding to some word will change the word in Japanese of how they say it, example: Sorry – Gomennasai , i’m sorry – shitsureishimashita , as you see, i only added “I’m” word and it changed very much, and there is no part of the word “Gomennasai” nor “Suimasen” , and why there are “Gomennasai” and “Suimasen” if the meaning is the same ? well…it depends whom you tell it, as i read it from some place, the older people use more of Suimasen , younger people say Gomennasai, that’s why in anime you get more Gomennasai word than Suimasen to hear, and Suimasen needs to be said if you apologize to higher-ups , gomennasai is used when you talk with friend or family.
Jaz says
Firs of all, thank you for some really insightful comments here.
My story is we’re both foreign students in USA, randomly asked her out (didnt really like her or anyything serious) and within a weekend got her to bed (sooner if i jsut paid attention to the signs). We then dated for about 2 years when she graduated and went back home – not giving USA life a shot.
She was never meant to be anything more than a fill in relationship but then she started cooking for me. Holy cow, I even said it wasnt necessary and laughed it off but soon I was devouring those fuckin stale rice and vege (of course I had her add more spice and *always* have some gravy to mix it with). She was a dead fish sexually, but a great thing about that is she does whatever I tell her to do. Then at some point, she started riding on top of me and also started convulsing (and yes yes she was noisy as a bird had to cover her mouth sometimes).Thats when I started saying ‘lets make love’ ahaa just to see her derive pleasure. The thing that sealed the fuckin deal was her patience- i pushed and pushed knowing full well shell reluctatnly agree to do this or that then I guess I saw oh hell this girl really likes me.
Los Angeles is the last place on earth I would expect to find such a loyal girl. Soon the face without makeup seemed cute as hell, and I got to know why she put up. She said japanese guys just treat their women badly, women in general comparatively to the USA are just treated differently, culture so much more conservative, heirachy laden. Difference between Japan and rest of Asia is that the developing nations in Asia are more on the liberal-western side of things, or mixed, but Japan is a full fledged DEVELOPED INDUSTRIALIZED nation and at current rates their graduates earn en par or more than US salary but is still conservative for the most parts.
Which brings me to a point made by a few others. Their youths, much like the Europeans and North Americans can afford to go abroad live/study but , in my observation, a much stronger desire to ESCAPE but would come to a realization that eventually they would have to go back. Its like an extended work vacation. For me, coming to USA is a culmination of a dream and Im fuckin determined to take the best practices back home (if i do go home that is!) but for her – “too different”.
I knew she was going to leave for good and all that and to be honest I thought it was great I wasnt going to settle down in America with a Japanese girl, right? Man, I dont realy care as long as I get my rocks off but lately Ive been dying for some greeting when I get home, some food, low maintenance, etc.I guess you can only imgine how a white/black girl Ive dated, who I realy enjoy talking with, so many similarities etc – try asking for a glass of water more than once a month and theyll start debating chauvinism theories.
She was boring and naiive, but for once I felt like a man – I helped her discover things, brought her to places, she cried when I wrote a birthday card (???) and she thinks its GREAT at least i just nod when pretending to listening to her. Holy frack. She definitely had her bad sides -extremely immature way of dealing with problems but like any realtionship you stay if the good outweighs the bad
Oh, and she did say she’s the ‘countryside’ type of girl.
Now I miss her as hell, I tell people she has ‘domesticated’ me and just being 26 (shes a year older than me) I have this image of a family with a japanese wife who hopefully would NOT be an over-analytical alcholic who thinks gender equality is peeing standing. We dont talk now because suddenly she thinks missing me is going to stop her chances of hitching (yes she says she feels in the ‘desperate women loser club’ as she says it). Goodfucking luck to her.
My question is – have you any expereince with the late 20’s early 30’s women who WORK outside of japan in fields like humanitarian efforts, journalism, foreign affairs, – the kind who want to see the world but in a holistic way. I dont expect answers but, YES, i am entertaining the idea that Id like to get married to a woman with japanese family values and is ‘international’ mind set, eventually. What do you think
Rolfen says
Uh dude I would at least give your relationship a chance of surviving. You seem to have fallen in love with her, and she does sound like a great catch, from what you’ve described (it’s not like you found yourself in love with someone who you would not normally want to be around with (happens…!).
My view is a bit simplistic, I understand, you may not be ready, I understand, she may change, I understand… but anyway, I think it deserves a chance and it would be a problem if you don’t give it a chance because you might regret it (or not?) so anyway, good luck!
Tony says
Well pal. Im sure there are such . If you read my previous posts I/m a bit experinced on that field.
My question to you is why you dont give it a shoot with lady that you met??
If you cant, here are few advises:
as you noticed they are diferent (good and bad)
Try to get some one that comes from smaller cities not Tokyo or Osaka and so on. (but than again even from there you might be ok).
If you really have the thing for japanese I suggest go to japan guide.com and see if you can met your match there. You might met a friend there that might be able to advise or be your future partner.
By the way you are way to young to be married .
I hear they make great wifes (sometime lol)
Im going to give it a shot myself this summer (a lady I know for 7 yrs is moving with me she is leaving everything back in japan).
She is 29 Im over 40 my friend so trust me you will have plenty of chances plenty of time.
I can tell after two years you have the “thing for nijon” lol.
I got the thing for nijon 8 yrs ago after a trip to Hawai. I got hooked and never lost it. :).
My curent one is Japanese also she is a sweet heart she is only 21 and I been with her for two yrs. It will not be easy for me to break up soon but I got to do it.
She is like a lil engel always smiling when i come back from work.
I have decided I will take care of her for while even after my other one comes in. (of course it will be no sex after that just friendship) cus she was such a loyal lil thing to me for so long.
Anyway my friend .
1) do not give up in USA you come here stay here and make it. ( i did )
2) if you like Japanese than marry a japanese give it a try.
best luck
Mishi says
Were in the world can you find beautiful girl find me on facebook misheck makona
japanese language gakusei says
you can find them in http://www.idontknow.com
Dr. K says
Interesting read. As for me been here 2 years and not interested in Japanese women. Don’t get me wrong they are nice people but attitudes, values, body type..etc just didn’t do it for me. Also found them introverted, boring and lacking passion.
Honestly, I did far better back home with women than here. I think Japanese women prefer a certain type (as mentioned above). Then again I came here for the money and not the women.
Again not hating on anyone who is happy with their Japanese girlfriend/wife. Everyone deserves to be happy in life. Besides, it would be a crappy world if everyone liked the same type of woman/man. Also even my Japanese (male) friend(s) prefer non Japanese women so it’s not just a gaijin thing.
Alex says
How do Japanese girls think about transsexual/gay/bisexual? Is there a common acception or rejection in that country?
Randell says
I Just had to comment lol…
First your all funny ..
second no need to flame me for saying that, cause i wont be back here anytime soon to see Your reply lol
Third just go talk to a girl you muppets Asian or English Blah Blah all chics like confident guys all chics like people that dont stuff around and just do what they have to and then dont sit around bitching about all the things they had todo like it’s so much more important than what anyone else had todo
Forth Man idk there is no help for people that spend all there day time writing about getting girls and not actually getting them.
Some People Walk Some People Talk And It Looks like you guys are doing all the talking for me so im going to get all them stunning Asian girls for myself. Dont worry fellas im walking for us all lol
Umm no point hating on me i wont be back lol Peace
CubsWin says
To all men who are interested in Japanese women….Run!!!!!!! I lived in Japan 3 years and I currently married to a Japanese women for 5 years and live in CA. Every Japanese women who is married to a “gaijin” that I have met, has had some serious issues. People get awed/sucked in by their lack of verbal vigor, tradition/honor and conflict avoidance that western women are the opposite of. People see this as submissiveness but it’s not; it’s cold calculation. You are being sized up for marriage, kids, and financial support and that’s it.
I know, I know….My girlfriend/wife is not like this, you can’t stereotype! Yes you can!!!! When Japanese male student after student tell you they only married their wife to have kids and have her raise them so they can have a girlfriend who they “love” in the city, you see the expectations of marriage for Japanese women. If they can’t marry Japanese (expected) they marry gaijin. You will never truly know what they are thinking and they will express themselves only through actions/gestures. Not so bad to adapt but only if it was a 2 way street. Marriage among Westerners and Japanese is so difficult because of our differences in; marital expectations, values, communication, beliefs/spirituality, and what is important in life. My wife asked me, if a building was on fire and no one was around, would I run into the building and save people even if that meant risking my life and making my wife a widow and “future possible: children fatherless? I said emphatically yes and her answer was that I was foolish and selfish to risk my life for strangers because I had a family. Life, money, sex, family all have different meanings.
If you insist on playing with Japanese women; use a condom (check for pin holes), don’t get committed, don’t lie and say you love them, know the game, pump and dump, and enjoy being young. If you still want to be committed; get a girl that is half Japanese or was raised in the west. Or man up get some confidence and marry in your own country. Good luck……
Pete says
I think it all depends on the girl you choose. I am married for 4 years with a Japanese women that I met in Japan and yes communication needed some adaptation but didn’t face any of your problem. Why? Well because she studied 7 years in a western country. There is a difference between a Japanese women who wants a Gaijin because it is cool or a fantasy in her head and the one that wants a western guy because she knows the culture and prefer a real relationship to having babies and staying home while her husband comes back at 11h00 pm drunk everyday because of the job. We live in China now and I hear the same stories about Chinese women. However I know a bunch of guys married to Chinese women for many years and happy. All of the wife are western educated and work in foreign companies. Simple choose someone from a different background but not complete ignorant of your own culture.
Food for thoughts.
Mark says
Well my wife is Japanese and the last time I was in Japan I met a young lady 27 in Akihabara and went straight to a love hotel with her spent 2 hours having wild sex together like my wife and I used to have before we where married.
The girl was stunning and we only spoke for about 5 minutes before I asked her if she wanted to go to a love hotel and I was shocked when she said yes still sometimes can’t believe that it happened.
I received a couple of emails from her but generally she just wanted a Gaijin Fling which was awesome, there are some many girls like this over there, trying to convince the wife to move over there to be closer to her family.
Tony123 says
Hi, I live in CA and I just met a japanese girl here in LA, we had ramen and went to her place for some drinks. We had sex that night and the morning after. I am chinese and she’s been to LA for 1.5 yr. I know she sleeps around with guys. I try to keep in touch with her, and she’s only replying me selectively. I am considering to try and know her better and maybe date her if possible but i am really not sure if she’s interested? Or is it just the japanese culture is played out like this, so she’s not replying as often now? Or is it a rule that after one night stand, she will act differently?
Rolfen says
Why don’t you ask her?
Worldtuner says
If all you’re going to Japan for is sex then forget it have some respect for yourself and the Japanese people, they are no different than the American girls, except slimmer and more polite it ends there, Should you ever think you are the best lover and they will drop at your feet, forget it you need to wake up if you can’t find an girl back in your own country you will not stand a chance here. Stop believing all the junk some guys write about what they’ve had and how easy it’s all ball, every city as it’s red light district and that’s where most of these guys hang out paying for it, it’s the same the world over, all good girls you have to work hard for and be honesty, committed to a marriage, if your not then pay for it like everyone else.