Electronic aids are nothing new in the Japanese home, with devices available for a variety of tasks — including entertaining children and caring for the elderly.
Some manufacturers, however, have decided to move away from such practical concerns, focusing much more on personal pleasure. This, erm, mechanical masturbator being a prime example.
For frustrated fellas reticent to subject their genitalia to a rather severe looking synthetic squeeze, the appliance comes with other, slightly less alarming attachments.
Removal of the ‘hand’ for example allowing for straightforward insertion, with the machine kindly taking care of all necessary movements.
Such versatility making it a real a bargain at only 34,500 yen (170 pound). Comfortably beating the competition hands down.
moonwarden says
masturbating isn’t dirty anymore… jeezzz
melina says
versatility or perversatility?
Muppetlord says
er…ok. How bored were they when they came up with this?
englishman says
will it make me go blind?
Brett says
Oh come on people! Get a grip!
M0 says
It also accommodates the EXTREME Masturbator with a vibrating butt plug (top pic) attached to a phone line incase you’d like to call someone.
Give a HOLE new meaning to the slogan “Reach out and Touch someone!”
Paul says
Would you get arrested using it whilst driving and if not, is there an adaptor to plug it in the cigarette lighter?
Tony Lopez says
I just wan to know something: does it come in different sizes?
michael.... says
And if you’ve had enough of a wank you can even make a cake mix….. what wanker thought of this….. LOL
Joey B. says
Do they make it in Large?
someone says
What is that other part on picture 1 , with the cable .
Is that a butt plug.
Well i guesh then this machine is made for Gay
Mondain says
This is sweet.. where do I put in my order. 😉
matty j. says
Do they make an attachment with a tissue dispenser?
Anton says
You have to give there people a hand for being original. it’s hard to get a grip of how they even made such a thing! Amazing! What will they think of next…
The Dude says
As the Dude once said, “I perfer to jerk off manually”
Sika says
subspace
charly says
Rejoyce …rejoyce … no more hair in my hands
JIm says
And it makes one hell of a shaken marquirita.
Hahaguy says
WTF? VALHALLA ROXORS! ALL OF US SHOULD PLACE BULK ORDER!!!
eric john says
damm they have toys for ladies but not for men thats a good one lol
Los Vince says
ok this is too much.. goddamn.. people are weirder every day. The world is going to hell.. >:(
Paul says
Isn’t this the same company that made the salad shooter?
isarah says
i will buy three *laughs*
Jimmy says
The comments are the best part of this page!
chachi says
If it comes with a paint shaker attachment I’m in for one!
seasaw says
Does this device come in either right or left handed models??? Us lefties have rights too you know…
pookie dead says
Speed controls? Range of motion controls? Does it simulate switching hands when tired? Does it lose a stroke, or is the transition smooth?
greg says
Does it have UL certification
Fazle says
After a week of using this product I lost 10 pounds!!!!!
Robert says
Great idea! Leaves hands free for beer and a piece of pizza.
Rush L says
choices choices
XBOX 360…ERM…
Chris says
I’m going to buy one and take it to the footie.
Hold it up in front of the opposition.
The ultimate insult.
Also the butt plug extention can help stir my tea (those little white sticks just dont do the job)
Is it avaliable on hire purchase?
90 day satisfaction guarentee or your money back 😛 Haha.
Although…the worst would have to be someone selling it second hand. Literally.
R1CHY and ADAM says
Do they make a double ended ones for us gay lads…
Joe Blow says
\m/\m/
Rock on!!
Luis says
Gosh look goood i want one.
Atashi says
Neat~ I want one.
But what if it malfunctions and blows up/applies too much pressure?
Skazna says
All I want for Christmas is my two front teeth, and one of these.
Tiago Celestino says
Ridicule 😀 Very good.
MaurÃcio says
wow… wtf!
real F… lol
TRTerror says
jay snyder, your upgrade has now arrived….
experience the pleasure of hand free..er………pleasure.
Snark says
There once was a man named McQueen,
Who invented a wanking machine.
Convex for girls,
Concave for boys,
And attachments for those in-between!
tele says
But where is the ethernet interface and the remote control applet?
bob wondernut says
There once was a man from Raceen
Who invented a beat off machine
Concave or convex
It would suit either sex
But oh what a mother to clean!
Fernando says
Japones tem q mesmo que ter essas ideias, nao come ninguem, ahuhuahuahuhua
Adriana says
Vão se fuder seus bando de punheteiros…!
Adriana says
O rappael aki de manaus quer uma máquina dessa pois ele tá com a mão cheia de calo de tanto bater punheta >>>>>
Arlindo says
Que coisa fofa! O cara é duplamente masturbado enquanto assiste tv. Aquele vibrador de brinde é foda.
Jo-Bob says
I’m in to interacial love….can I get one with a black hand?
George says
Does the hand get hot for more pleasure ?
Angel Of death says
essa ideia é pra quem não comu mulher e que fica só na vontade.
oi Adriana quer bater um papo comigo???
Meu hotmail: [email protected]
[email protected]
Angel Of death says
Ai Japoneses querem Pussy Lover’s venham aqui no Brazil…. aqui tem de montão e gostosas mesmo….
nanpanman says
OMG! this must be the new Nintendo Revolution I’ve been hearing about on the internets! o_0
Big in Sweden says
Shit… I Want one NOW ;).. Finally a toy for men that seems to work, and i hope it can mix drinks after it have done what it is made for..
ian says
is it dishwasher safe?
Fred Frippiat says
https://www.tokyotimes.org/?p=702
Hey Fred & Muska, got the pictures…can’t make out baby features yet…she’s one big baby…hmmm I want one too! =)
Fred, guess you won’t need this contraption any longer huh?! =)
Laters,
Geoff
Louis-Philippe says
Can I use it in an aircraft during take-off?
Incommunicado says
Holy crap! That’s one amusing invention. Well, at least we know it might stem the AIDs epidemic if it becomes popular. IF. But then who would subject his sensitive family jewels to a machine? What if the machine goes crazy??
Knarkofagen says
How lazy can people get?? rofl
Wank Boy says
Yu tossers! You’ve put me out of a job, I used to give hand jobs for cash, how can that happen if you are creating these – these Robots to wank people!
Thankyou VERY much !
RSBNG says
As long as it doesn’t bitch and complain what the heck! You don’t even have to take it out for a dinner and a movie!
joe harring says
The Answer to Maureen Dowd’s book, “Are Men Necessary?”
Marcel says
Further info for aquisition
rrreeeqqquuuiiirrreeeddd
I want one too
Brazilian Zueira says
HA HA HA COISA DE JAPA QUE NÃO PEGA MUIÉ! Afinal, o piru da japaiada é microscópico! HA HA HA HA AH AHAHAHAH
Asgard says
Stop Punhetation;
Fuck the Bucetation!!!
[Metal Bucetation – Massacration]
This sucks Mann!!
I prefer the good and old Vagina! hehehehe
Stz says
sera que na segunda versão ele podem adapta-la para chupar também???
Ptocomptobr says
hua hua hua ! Falta lançarem a versão no tamanho para o brasileiro! E uma versão feminina para a Adriana, que ficou invejosa! Dá-lhe na DRI DRI!!!
robert jefferson says
carai de asa esses jap num tem mulhe fica inventando o PUNHETA 2000 i ainda é em tamanho ppp…
hate says
works like a charm. one good thing for us bodybuilders….. no uneven arm muscle growth
jose says
legal
Bill CIinton says
Dunno bout you guys, that hand makes me H O R N Y!
Yea baby, yea!
Akira says
ahahaha! Only in Japan! 😉
Raymond says
I wonder who tested these before it was released to the markets.
That leads me to wonder, what happened to the people who first tried the prototypes. Overheating of the wires, causing burns?
😉
HASSE says
yEEEAAAHHHH! NOW I DONT NEED TO GO OUT HUNTING PUSSY!!!!!!!!!!!
Clockwork says
Imagine explaining that one to your mum…
red says
Jeez Oz, what’s to explain? : )
william clayton says
I wonder if Pee Wee Herman will be the spoke person for it. The music could be its got the whole world in its hand
jho bronha says
grêmio, brasil yaehhhhh
oh yes it´s bom pra nóis punheteiro
Person says
Thats because japanese arent good at scoring with chicks. Now they have a solution.
Ricardo says
Yo wazzap fockas I just bought that damn thing cause I just went to that shity country.. it actually works.. im telling ya
uhnothanks(anonymous) says
ummm whoever said “is is dishwasher safe”… would you want to put it in with your dishes?
grep says
Wow, they must be making money hand over fist!
cida moreira says
o bobo jerferson , ja encomendou né?
n é so japa q n pega ng, vcs são todos arames lisos so cerca e n pega nada
ah eu sobrando kkkkkkkkkk
aposto q após essa invensão definitivamente vcs serão mais preguiçosos
marcos says
quando falsificarem eu compro…
kki says
Pedi um pro KKI ele precisa
Luis Rodriguez says
Mi nombre es luis Rodriguez de Panama,
En los años 80 vi en un suplemento japones que venia en la hustler de los primeros bosquejos de esta maravillosa maquina que ha cambiado mi vida. Ahora me siento completo, esto ha llenado un vacio que nadie me ha podido llenar o mejor dicho que yo no he podido llenar.
Creo que cada hombre insatisfecho deberia tener uno en su cama, en el carro, en la oficina.
simplemente quiero decir:
GRACIAS MENS SOM!!! me has salvado la vida.
carlos says
Mi nombre es Carlos Barcenas, y también soy de Panama. Hace años me vi forzado a comprar un aparato masturbador femenino en forma de un voluptuoso Pene hombre africano para metermelo en la boca, ya que nada mas la abro para decir impertinencias, las que comunico también de forma escrita y por señas. Este desorden se desarrolló porque desde pequeño vivo en una burbuja plástica que me protege del oxÃgeno al que soy alérgico y ha resultado en daño permanente a mi cerebro, y a la vez me privó de toda capacitación para interactuar en sociedad. Me gusto tanto el aparato que ordené otro para metermelo por el hueco del pipi y zarandearme las piedras que tengo en los riñones, costumbre que adquirà desde niño. Lo recomiendo para todos.
Luchinnis P. says
En nombre del Asilo Matias Hernandez de Panama, quiero pedir disculpas a la comunidad masturbatoria cibernetica por la actividad de nuestros pacientes Luis “el Maletas” Rodriguez y Carlos “Burbujito” Barcenas. Estos dos fascinerosos fueron internados en el sistema psiquiatrico panameño hace años por adiccion a la pornografia y por una fijacion anal respectivamente. Como parte de un programa piloto en que se le daba a los internos uso de computadoras para que se convirtieran en miembros productivos de la sociedad, Maletas y Burbujito accidentalmente recibieron acceso al internet. Le quiero asegurar a la comunidad internacional que ambos lunaticos han sidos amarrados a un palo de mamon y fueteados con ramas de jobo, un innovador tratamiento desarrollado por nuestro fundador, el Dr. Z. De nuevo, pedimos disculpas por cualquier alarma que hayan causado susodichos pacientes.
Tiago Celestino says
Pueta 😀
tiago says
parece q é pequeno, sera que tem um pro meu penis de 18 cm?????
[email protected] says
wetnq36nw6 mey5n w5yn ys enyq45y6n w436yw5ys
jam says
OMg… thats awesome… that will fuck u up when ur driving tho… proly gonna make it illegal to drive with soon…. DUI style…
Brian says
I hope it’s dual voltage.Remember….on the 99th stroke the bloody thing broke and whipped his bollocks to cream :o(
Bagao!! says
Mas que porra é essa coisinha? não se parece com nada!! bando de escroto… não conseguem comer mulheres e ficam inventando essas merdas…
Toni says
Holy shit Lee. This must be the most comments you’ve ever received…and it’s for a robotic handjob toy 😀
rian says
caralho q komedia
Northbo says
mrs. Right would probobly be way to jealous if got one of these.. :/
Terry Coghlan says
Hi, my name is terry, i would love to get my hands on one of these so me and my boys can get randy. I just cant wait to touch Luke Harpers small one. cya later guys!!! EWWWWW
CAIO says
QUE BOA IDEIA
Leandro says
Todo japones gosta de de fio terra
Unknown says
Baka yarooooooooo!!!
Nendoksendaneeee…
Unknown2 says
Japa pervertido e punheteiro detected…
Arriba!! says
Old..
Ya says
Product site:
http://www.somjapan.com/
Heh… Women’s version available too…
ricky says
fuck wats happening with these japanese, dont u guys have chicks mates, fucking pepal r getting crazy, my hands know wat pressure i want this cud b real dangerous heheheheheheh but wont mind trying once.
simon says
lazy ass world !!!!!!
Daevid says
What do you say if you get stopped in customs?
I hear Dyson have an attachment that is better.
Cymru am byth!
el_punheta says
uhuuuuuuuu!!!
Now i can use my mouse and masturbate at the same time!!
Do u have any ideia how hard is to masturbate, use your mouse or just type only with the left hand?
C Jones says
£170 seems a bit steep, any chance of getting a demo? whats a hand job with out a hand job..
mathew says
where cani order this in english is there a website for this machine
mathew says
i went to that product site and went to english but there is no order page does anyone know where i can go to order this machine…..
DarthVal says
What’s next? A 2.0 Version with USB / Bluetooth / Ethernet / Wi-Fi with force – I mean – Sexy Feedback(r)? Could they call it SexyPod(r)? Just plug it on a computer and recall your favorites settings like amplitude, frequency, rythm and so on. Or, go online and let your favorite Virtual Muse(r) do the job. Ah, don’t forget your headphones and your credit card!
mathew says
anyone know where i can get this som machine in usa….
Vince Dazzler says
Greeeeeeeat!!! Now all I need are some Viagra light! (they’re only for wankers)
E says
awesome
George W. Bush says
What a great product! Just a shame I have such a small dick and and am too stupid to know how to place an order.
Oh well, back to screwing America.
AÄŸva Alesta Motel says
Thank you for the thorough instructions
Chang says
yall is stupid how many of yall order this cause u need to get some now
Chang says
stupid ass
Raman says
nice
Stephanie Taylor says
We stock two of the SOM machines, we opted for the petit Som for men, it has a better mechanism and a gripping latex sleeve, rather than the un-hand like hand! It is a super little machine offering a smooth pumping action – typically Japanses I suppose you would say, SOM is to sex toys what Honda is to cars!
So far we have sold many more of the Ladys SOM, they are the ultimate sex machine. We haven’t yet been able to ascertain whether it is sole women buying the machine to use for solo play, or if men are buying them for their women so they watch…..it does bring up a whole new range of possibilities and we had one couple who bought one so they both incoroperate it into their lovemaking – almost like a threesome. Bit of a language barrier though so if anyone writes fluent Japanese please e mail me, I have real trouble communicating with them!
xx
[email protected]
sophie says
so…my clients wont come to me anymore ?? =((
Demonoid says
One of these and a PS2……i’ll never leave the house!
T-Man says
How do I Order one of these?
josh says
that sounds like a fun little toy why hasnt anyone thought of this before. Finally no more babys!
lol? says
Jag tkr att de verkar oerhört bekväma.
JJ Gibson says
Anything to prevent this thing from getting stuck in the “on” position?
rootkit says
>Is it dishwasher safe?
no, she threw it at me 🙂
Phil Brennan says
What I want to know is “Do they have an ambidextrous model?”
tc says
Strictly for up and coming young men?
guinnesspunter says
Do they come in different sizes?
Anime says
that hand look like a man’s hand…..it’s for gays….
Jeskin says
goood looord, i heard only people with low sex drive has it !
Dave says
Some say the inventor or sort of idea director was a woman…can you believe that? i’m afraid that someday woman might be more powerful than us and i’m pretty sure all men’s weakness IS woman….yikes
John says
The Japanese don’t have anything over the Americans. Take a look at http://www.mylovemachine.com. Now that’s Yankee Ingenuity.
Jonas says
jaewle slörunkare
Terry says
Where Can I get one and How Much
Roger Rabitaille says
Where can I get one and how much
Locksley McPherson Jnr says
Haha, some lazy people out there!
Paul Haggath says
I’m buying mine this week, i’ve already emailed my boss for the week off! I can’t wait to get my hands on this, all for a bargain £170
Russo.Tragik says
PUTA QUE O PARIU!
ESSE TA FODA!
OS CARA VÃO BATER UMA AGORA ASSIM???
FICARAM COM INVEJA DO VIBRADOR DAS MULHERES
SÓ TENHO MAIS UMA COISA A DIZER DESSES JAPONESES VIADOS…
TA FODA CAMARADA!
E VIVA STALIN!
ajj says
you never know with the mechanical ones… they might just yank it off!
tori says
They should make the hand look more feminine, give it a manicure and maybe a wedding ring. If I was a strait man I think I’d find it unappealing to have a manly-looking hand wank me off, no? Or it could come with man and woman hands, for those who prefer men o.O;
tony sacco says
where can i buy one, i’m old and my arms are tired, i’m serious
jizz says
She made it feels so long jizz shot ago. I.
Tina Lee says
Wow what a toy
Tina Lee says
This will surely hurt you if not put you in hospital for some stich work lol.
Jennifer says
I’m not too sure any man would want to get anywhere near that! lol, good post!
Noah says
Well I think this is pretty good. Considering there are a lot of men out there that have lost their hands and arms that could use a device like this. I ordered one for my friend that lost both hands in a farming accident. This is ideal for people that need help in this area.
rob hauser says
hi i woud like to no how to get one and the cost of it yours rob
vk says
Hell I’ll try it! Now whenever my girl wants to be stingy…I’ll pull it out. LOL
Jhonnie says
can i get my teachers head molded and use it as a attachment
anu says
is it available in india?where?how much the cost?
luke says
Surely they can do better than that,it looks real cheap. What about a full human size pleasure robot that talks .That will sell.
kittehsparkles says
I want to watch someone use it… would be good for teasing/edge play.