Sex

Japan’s unenviable position at the bottom of the ‘most at it like rabbits’ league table looks set to continue, with the seemingly less than passionate population quite possibly set to reduce the tryst tally even further this year.

At least this would certainly be the case were the poll restricted to married couples, as a recent survey by Bayer — which has been tirelessly translated by the far from wilting What Japan Thinks — found that the average number of sexual sojourns for a Japanese pair was a measly 17 a year, further strengthening the notion of the sexless marriage. A number so pitiful in fact that it makes the nation’s average figure of 45 forays seem almost feverish in its frequency.

Whilst a little over 10 percent of those questioned managed to make the effort at least once a week, the rest of the results make for less than encouraging reading. A sizeable 16 percent of those asked only indulge in a bit of intercourse once a month; however even this figure isn’t that bad when compared to those who haven’t had a bit of how’s your father for over a year — a whopping 34 percent.

Notably a thrifty 3 percent managed to just about keep up appearances by getting one ‘go’ in a year. Something of a holiday treat perhaps.