Tokyo Times

Photographs from a small group of islands

Travel

1 Comment

Mildly amusing English usage #2

It’s not unusual to see products or services with English names in Japan. Some of them are quite sensible, whilst others it has to be said are positively absurd. Plus there are also one or two of them that end up in the unfortunate category. The Seibu Railway’s super express train sadly falls into the latter group.

The name itself isn’t all that bad, as it’s the New Red Arrow. It even makes sense. The train is fast, so the arrow reference is certainly valid. The carriages are modern, so the new description rings true. And colour wise it’s, ahem, black and grey. But hey, lets not get picky, two out of three isn’t bad.

So up to now all is well and good, but on the train the name is shortened to just NRA.

red_arrow.jpg

Now how much truth there is in this I don’t know, as I’ve never been on the NRA. But rumour has it that the seats are equipped with gun holsters, and on the odd occasion Charlton Heston turns up as a guest driver. Although it has been said that some passengers have raised concerns about Mr.Heston’s rather elaborate train driving uniform.

heston_the_train_driver.jpg
Thou shalt be on time!

3 Comments

Mitsuoka’s mini monster

Japan’s Mitsuoka Motor Company unveiled a new electric car this week. Clocking in at a tiny 1.99 metres long and 0.88 metres wide, it’s ideally suited for driving around the congested city. And its lithium-ion battery gives the car an impressive 100 kilometres per charge.

That leaves just one problem. The design. I mean, just take a look at it.

electric_car.jpg

Ok, the production vehicles will have a different colour scheme (and presumably won’t have 100 kilometres emblazoned on the side), but it still doesn’t change the fact that it’s an ugly machine. And in appearance conscious Japan, I can’t see many cool cats wanting to be seen trundling around town in one of these.

I think I’ll stick with my bicycle.

1 Comment

Buttock botherer

Last week, the Singapore district court fined a Japanese sales executive 4,500 Singapore dollars for molesting two flight attendants on a trip from Seoul to Singapore.

Tomonori Daimon was found guilty of squeezing the buttocks of one flight attendant, and placing his hands on the hips of another. Whist pleading guilty to the charges, and admitting to being a little drunk, Mr. Daimon claimed that there was nothing untoward in his actions, as a quick squeeze of the buttocks was his way of a friendly greeting.

All I can say is that I’m glad I don’t work in the same office as the overly tactile Tomonori.

hello.jpg

Above is a gratuitous picture of a couple of young ladies (who just happen to be wearing bikinis) enthusiastically demonstrating the Daimon-san form of greeting yesterday.

3 Comments

Cake crazed crackpot

“I wanted to buy some cakes, but the store on the platform I was at was closed, so I crossed the tracks to buy the cakes from a store on the other platform”

This is what 41 year old bar owner Tadakazu Mitsui told the police after his subsequent arrest. Admittedly at first Mr. Mitsui’s actions seem a little dangerous, but nothing to get too upset about. That is until you find out that the platform he performed his daring run on was only for bullet trains. Which nobody needs reminding travel a fair bit faster than you’re average locomotive.

The cake loving dare devil wasn’t content with just one death defying attempt though, as after purchasing his sugary dessert, he made the perilous journey back. And if all that wasn’t enough, to give the feat even more of an edge, Mr. Mitsui was drunk.

Now whilst I have been known to eat the odd cake now and again, if it meant passing in front of one of these monsters, I don’t think I’d bother. Would you?

shinkansen02.jpg

No, I didn’t think so.

2 Comments

Puritan pretender

“I don’t know why their parents or teachers don’t say something to them.”

A commuter, grumbling at the growing anti-social behavior of school kids on trains, where they sit on the floor or lie down on seats.

Not only do they sit on the floor and lie on the seats, but they are often noisy, eat and drink on the train, and generally enjoy making a nuisance of themselves. But this is still preferable to a lot of adult behaviour found on and around public transport. Such as groping, peeking up skirts, exposing genitalia, and public trouser removal

Give me bad school kids any day!

2 Comments

Tired old gag

I’ve seen lots of driving centres (or whatever they are called) dotted around Tokyo, but this is the first one I’ve come across designed specifically for buses.

busschool.jpg

I don’t know how long it is before the prospective bus drivers’ venture out onto the real roads, but when they do they’ll be in for a rude awakening after the relative tranquility of the training ground. As you can see by the photograph, there’s a distinct lack of traffic. And perhaps more importantly, it’s totally devoid of middle-aged ladies cycling in random directions, their baskets filled with daily shopping.

I’m afraid to say though that whilst watching the new drivers cautiously make their way around the course, I had an overriding urge to shout, “Get a move on, you could fit a bus through there!” A joke (if indeed you could call it that) they have probably heard far too many times to remember. But the temptation was oh so strong.

Perhaps if I’d said it in English it would have been a bit more original? No, I thought not. Sorry.