Unless it’s a bar or there is alcohol involved, Tokyo isn’t necessarily the friendliest of cities. But, in the capital’s slowly dwindling older districts, it can be a very different story. Greetings are common, and conversations between strangers aren’t anywhere near as rare — the latter sometimes even occurring in the most comical of situations.
Despite her age, and the wide-eyed wonder that a foreigner can still inexplicably cause in Japan, this old lady didn’t bat an eyelid. Instead, after the briefest of pleasantries, I was hastily put to work — lifting up the difficult to move shutters, and then opening the semi-stuck sliding doors behind them. All the while she apologised about the amount of crap that had accumulated over the years, which now, at 93, she was simply too old and too tired to do anything about. Well, that and the war, her long-dead husband, precarious financial situation and the kids who rarely ever visit.
Yet once the shutters and door work was done, leaving proved difficult. As, after washing my hands as instructed, a lunch of instant ramen was offered, along with some booze from a selection of miniature bottles she managed to unearth from the bottom of a cupboard.
Politely declining both, however, changed nothing, and it quickly became apparent that she just wanted someone, anyone, to talk to. Even if that person didn’t understand everything she said. Or due to age and background, couldn’t really relate to her life story. Neither mattered in the slightest.
And so I listened to a lady stuck in the past, and yet at the same time also stuck in a present she has no great desire to continue living in. A sad lot at the end of a long life.
But we talked for a little while. She posed for a last photo. And if nothing else, the day turned out to be different than usual — for both of us.
Trev says
Fascinating post. Fabulous opening shot. Despite all that stuff she has, it still looks kind of tidy. Or was it really a complete and utter mess?
Lee says
Thanks a lot, Trev. The first shot I’m super pleased with. The others not quite so much, but they do at least tell a story.
That’s a good point. Yeah, I guess it was tidy in a crap all over the place kind of way. The entrance way was piled high with stuff too, but again, all in its place.
Martin says
Great photos and great story!
Lee says
Thanks a lot. It was an interesting experience.
Taki says
That was uplifting. Thanks!
Lee says
Hope it was. At least a bit. It certainly wasn’t all doom and gloom.
WP says
Interesting story, thanks for sharing! And yes, the first shot is the best in a candid way, but I really like the last one that she posed for too!
Lee says
You are very welcome.
It was a sweet moment. She desperately wanted to wear her favourite hat, but perhaps not surprisingly, she couldn’t find it…
Nathaniel Greene says
Awesome! I love stories like this. Older people have such a rich amount experiences and interesting past its easy to get caught up talking to them. And agreed, even though there is a ton of stuff in that room, it still looks like its all bundled tidily together.
Lee says
Cheers! Yes, that was definitely the case here. Lovely old woman, although it was a bit of a struggle at times as she was really quite deaf.
David says
You should get her address and ask all of your reader to send her a post card of where they ane and a hello.
Lee says
That’s a lovely idea.
Michael Vito says
You probably made her day. Sometimes I can sense the disappointment I’ve caused when I pull myself out of those situations after a few minutes. Have gotten better at not planning my walks so tightly that I don’t have wiggle room for unplanned adventures. Sometimes a good story is worth more than getting the shots.
Lee says
It’d be nice to think so.
Yeah, I obviously have a starting point and invariably a place to finish up, but the route there (and the time it takes) I try to leave as open as possible. That way I have as many options and alternatives as possible.
Bogdan says
Great story! I’ve been following your posts for a long time now, and I have always been curious (and now for the dreaded question): what camera do you use?
Lee says
Cheers!
Haha! Honestly, I don’t mind at all. I use a Leica M-E and a 35/2 lens. Realised that’s my ideal focal length, so stick with it. Means I can travel nice and light too. No camera bag. No annoying extras. Just the camera. It’s wonderful!
Hans ter Horst says
Great story, great experience; really something you would never have imagined!
Putting stuff on nice little heaps instead of just throwing it out? Why, that sounds like my wife 😉
Lee says
Thanks. Yeah, it certainly came out of the blue. Not at all what I was expecting.
Haha, she isn’t alone there! The idea that, “You never know, it might come in useful for something.”
George Edwards says
She looks like such a sweetheart! I can’t help but feel that you could be the only person she’d talked to in a real long time…Must be terrible for the people of past generations living in a city like Tokyo, just forgotten on the fringes of the city.
Lee says
I know. She’s probably just seen as an irritant to many people living nearby. Fortunately, however, it is an old neighbourhood, so she may well know people who have also lived there for years.
AF says
Definitely, one of the down sides of major cities is stress from trying to meet deadlines and becoming sad along the way of obtaining success. Therefore I am in love with the country side of Japan because the closer to a capital the bigger is the pressure to follow formal rules (Japan is an expert at that and eventually a person gets crazy like some hikikomori or salary men). I too think there is a lot to see outside and behind the lights of big cities and when it comes to people of certain age they suffer the most from the disadvantages of living far from nature when simultaneously being expelled from the main stream…
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I can almost see that those belongins are a symbol of will to create a kind of garden of memory. If the person can’t have space to grow pets and plants he or she will find a way to keep alive. That person is a fighter.
Lee says
Yes, very good points. In many ways it really isn’t a city for old people. But for those who have grown up there, it’s hard to imagine what the alternatives are. Heaven knows what kind of changes they have seen in their lifetime though. A city destroyed, rebuilt and then upgraded countless times. It must be utterly unrecognisable in many areas.
Valérie says
Lovely, touching, sad. Thank you for all the wonderful pictures you’re offering everyday.
Lee says
Not at all. I take photos because I want to — have to even. So if other people get something out of them as well, that’s even better.
Valérie Fujita says
Definitely, I really love the humanity you bring into your pictures. I’m too young as a photographer to be able to achieve this yet (not sure I can even make it some day). The last one is a gem : the grandma attitude, the shyness that can be read in her eyes ; it’s like you can see the little girl she once used to be. I love that one.
Lee says
Yeah, it’s a really sweet image. And that’s a lovely idea, seeing a hint of the little girl she used to be.
Thanks, I’m glad you think so. Just pressing the shutter at the right time I guess, although more importantly I believe it’s a case of getting out as often as possible. The more you see and shoot, the nearer you get to achieving the images you want. Or at least I think that’s the case. Or more accurately, hope!
June says
Hmmm, sad but still such a lovely story. She seems like such a lovely old lady. So kind of you to stay and chat.
Lee says
She was, and to be honest I had very little choice in the matter!
Jeffrey says
You’re more than a decent bloke, Lee.
Lee says
That’s very nice of you to say. But honestly, it was the least I could do. And I got just as much out of our chat.
Mike says
I wonder if anyone is taking oral histories of people like this?
Lee says
Can’t say for certain, but probably not.
Tri says
This lady reminds me of my wife’s grandmother. She’s in a nursing home now (at 112 yo) but used to live by herself in a house next to my wife’s dad. Her place was as messy looking and had the same indications of the pack rat mentality. My wife told me that this mentality was a result of living through WW II when things were in such short supply that you tried to save everything in case it could be put to use.
Lee says
Yeah, considering what she presumably went through, that make a lot of sense. She reminded me of my grandmother a bit as well. A woman who had outlived her friends and many of her family, and felt there wasn’t a right lot worth hanging about for…